There’s nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.
ERMA BOMBECKIt takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
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Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died.
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Thanksgiving dinners take eighteen hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not coincidence.
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I never leaf through a copy of National Geographic without realizing how lucky we are to live in a society where it is traditional to wear clothes.
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When the going gets tough, the tough make cookies.
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Success is outliving your failures.
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All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.
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Grandparenthood is one of life’s rewards for surviving your own children.
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If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
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When you’re lecturing teenagers and they begin to hum and leave the room, you can sense there is hostility.
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Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.
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A grandparent will help you with your buttons, your zippers, and your shoelaces and not be in any hurry for you to grow up.
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It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
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How come anything you buy will go on sale next week?
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When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, ‘I used everything you gave me’.
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Volunteers are the only human beings on the face of the earth who reflect this nation’s compassion, unselfish caring, patience, and just plain love for one another.
ERMA BOMBECK