The only “ism” Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.
DOROTHY PARKERThe cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.
More Dorothy Parker Quotes
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If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
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A girl’s best friend is her mutter.
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Don’t feel bad when I die; I’ve been dead for a long time.
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Of Orson Welles: It’s like meeting God without dying.
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Drink and dance and laugh and lie, Love, the reeling midnight through, For tomorrow we shall die! (But, alas, we never do.)
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Genius can write on the back of old envelopes but mere talent requires the finest stationery available.
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Time may be a great healer, but it’s a lousy beautician.
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I hate writing, I love having written.
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There is entirely too much charm around, and something must be done to stop it.
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Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
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The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.
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If all the young ladies who attended the Yale promenade dance were laid end to end, no one would be the least surprised.
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That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can’t say ‘No’ in any of them.
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Ducking for apples — change one letter and it’s the story of my life.
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If I didn’t care for fun and such, I’d probably amount to much. But I shall stay the way I am, Because I do not give a damn.
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Now I know the things I know, and I do the things I do; and if you do not like me so, to hell, my love, with you!
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A little bad taste is like a nice dash of paprika.
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This is me apologizing. I am a fool, a bird-brain, a liar and a horse-thief. I wouldn’t touch a superlative again with an umbrella.
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Women and elephants never forget.
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Those who have mastered etiquette, who are entirely, impeccably right, would seem to arrive at a point of exquisite dullness.
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You can lead a horticulture, but you can’t make her think.
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Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it and it darts away.
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A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
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That woman speaks eighteen languages, and can’t say ‘No’ in any of them.
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Most good women are hidden treasures who are only safe because nobody looks for them.
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There’s a hell of a distance between wisecracking and wit. Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words.
DOROTHY PARKER