Everyone I love I pay.
BOB SAGETI love telling stories and acting and entertaining people. I don’t want to make fun of people.
More Bob Saget Quotes
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My dad’s like, If your mom and I are having sex and we videotape it and she falls out of bed funny, can I win ten-thousand dollars?
BOB SAGET -
I don’t censor myself, but I don’t want to force my sick-skewed version of the world, either.
BOB SAGET -
Today is a brand new day. A day of change, of promise, of creativity, of kindness, and of love. I’m going back to bed.
BOB SAGET -
My mom told me she thinks a man in the market felt her up today. I asked, Where did he touch you? She said, On my knee, Bobby.
BOB SAGET -
I’d like a nice piece of salmon that’s not too pink inside and yet isn’t too dry or crisp either.
BOB SAGET -
What I have now are good problems of trying to decide and what I really want to do is good work next. My phone’s ringing a lot more and I’ve got nine lines so when it doesn’t ring, it’s very frustrating.
BOB SAGET -
I have no plan except to take care of the people I love.
BOB SAGET -
The selfish and usually pointless approach is to try to get both done simultaneously – accomplish your work at hand while begging forgiveness of those close to you while you’re basically working in front of them during what could’ve been specifically ‘quality time.’
BOB SAGET -
If you’re hanging out with two negative people, do they equal one positive person?
BOB SAGET -
Some people rely on rumors and gossip because they are devoid of any original thought.
BOB SAGET -
The squirrel in my yard really knows his way around the neighborhood.
BOB SAGET -
I am stressed because once I am flattened out so thin to be able to slide under a doorway, I may never be able to ever be unflattened so I could be regular sized again.
BOB SAGET -
No one gets a free ride. Except maybe bus drivers.
BOB SAGET -
What I’ve learned about comedy people is that they’re defined by the harshest level they’ve been to, their personal Auschwitz.
BOB SAGET -
Nothing worse than a piece of dried out fish.
BOB SAGET







