It’s a new day: Full of promise and love. The only thing that can take away that great feeling is – reading the news or speaking to people.
BOB SAGETI have a feeling I’m going to wake up one day and say ‘I can’t do dirty stuff anymore, I want to go all clean.’ I’ll do clean stuff too, I like to entertain people. Then they egged me on; we shot it at The Laugh Factory.
More Bob Saget Quotes
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I have the brain of a German Shepherd and the body of a 16-year-old boy; they’re both in my car and I want you to see them
BOB SAGET -
Yet there are some people – Steve Allen would dissect comedy forever; he’s a really funny guy, but he would love talking about comedy. I’m doing it right now and you all seem bored.
BOB SAGET -
Friend of mine just told me he used to be a bad alcoholic. I calmed him down. Told him he was a good alcoholic just a horrible drinker.
BOB SAGET -
Words matter. Especially ones with four letters.
BOB SAGET -
I don’t like to drink alone ’cause there’s nobody to fight with.
BOB SAGET -
A good way to keep your relationship together is not to scream in terror when you see your partner naked.
BOB SAGET -
It’s smart to marry your yoga teacher so when you get divorced you know how to go down on yourself.
BOB SAGET -
I just had a pedicure. My feet are soft like a baby’s behind. If his ass was covered in calluses.
BOB SAGET -
I’d like a nice piece of salmon that’s not too pink inside and yet isn’t too dry or crisp either.
BOB SAGET -
I wouldn’t hurt a flea. I’d finger a spider though.
BOB SAGET -
I don’t censor myself, but I don’t want to force my sick-skewed version of the world, either.
BOB SAGET -
I like to approach every day like it’s my first, so this morning when I woke up I covered my body with red gelatin.
BOB SAGET -
I’m doing 5000 seat theaters and audiences are going nuts, it’s fantastic and it makes me very happy. I’m dirty, but not like this; I just do comedy that I find funny. I’m working on a new tv show for cable and it’s not set up yet.
BOB SAGET -
25, 30 years ago, that meant something, they were making some money. And they were doing all sorts of comedy, screaming at the audience, basically crowd control. And then there was the whole urban comedy scene.
BOB SAGET -
What I’ve learned about comedy people is that they’re defined by the harshest level they’ve been to, their personal Auschwitz.
BOB SAGET







