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Happiness is watching the TV at your girlfriend’s house during a power failure.

Bob Hope

If you think golf is relaxing, you’re not playing it right.
BOB HOPE

Golf Relax Right Thinking
When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano.
BOB HOPE

Music Names Personality Play
My secret for staying young is good food, plenty of rest, and a makeup man with a spray gun.
BOB HOPE

Gun Makeup Men Spray
Bing Crosby and I weren’t the types to go around kissing each other. We always had a light jab for each other.
BOB HOPE

Doing Nothing Kissing Light
We didn’t know that in America after the war, you wouldn’t be able to get into a sushi joint without a reservation. And we thought they lost.
BOB HOPE

Able Although Country Lost Reservation
When you get over 95, every day is your day.
BOB HOPE

Country Day Every Get Over People
And on nearby islands, the Japanese army was eating raw fish. We felt sorry for them.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny People Sorry War
It was a typically British birth… I was three at the time. They had a strike in the maternity ward… I came out in sympathy.
BOB HOPE

Funny Hilarious Sympathy Witty
Kids are wonderful, but I like mine barbecued.
BOB HOPE

Comedy Kids Wonderful
She got to enjoy the personal side of the players. They were her kids. The Braves were her family.
BOB HOPE

Braves Family Kid Players
Whenever I play with him , I usually try to make it a foursome – the President, myself, a paramedic and a faith healer.
BOB HOPE

Golf Paramedic Play Trying
I’ve always felt England was a great place for a comic to work. It’s an island and the audience can’t run very far.
BOB HOPE

Funny Humorous Running
It’s so cold here in Washington, D.C., that politicians have their hands in their own pockets.
BOB HOPE

Cold Hands Pockets Politician
Lots of travel, away from home.
BOB HOPE

Away From Home Line One
I’ve been married fifty-five years and I’ve been home three weeks.
BOB HOPE

Home Marriage Years
Failure is the only thing I’ve ever been a success at.
BOB HOPE

Decent Garden State

Happiness is watching the TV at your girlfriend’s house during a power failure.

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Happiness is watching the TV at your girlfriend’s house during a power failure.

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