Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only MOSTLY dead.
BILLY CRYSTALThat’s why that show, no matter who hosts it, it really should be a fast-thinking comedian who is really quick on their feet that can handle situations that happen, or somebody with that kind of mentality that can capitalize on something.
More Billy Crystal Quotes
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I can’t be funny if my feet don’t feel right.
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It is better to look good than to feel good.
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Even when I was in school shows, in elementary school doing plays, I’d always go off book and start improvising.
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I have 40-something intros [that Davis Jr. did]; all are different, none of them happened. And it was hilarious.
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By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he’s too old to go anywhere.
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I’ve always thought that the key to a good sex life is variety. That’s why God gave me two hands. Humans love sex, we need sex, it’s how we connect, it reminds us we’re alive, it’s the third most basic human need, after food and good movie popcorn.
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You have to really respect what your kids are doing with their kids and how they’re raising them. You can’t push your way into areas where you shouldn’t be saying anything.
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Dad had a music store, and he’d often bring home comedy albums that I would listen to. I started listening to Bob Newhart and Bill Cosby, and developing taste. They really influenced my style of comedy.
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Change is such hard work.
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I always came away thinking “I’d like to see her more,” you know? And then when [Parental Guidance] was ready to be cast, we thought – Bette [Midler]. So we called her.
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When you realize you want to invest the rest of your lifestyle with somebody, you want the rest of your life to commence as quickly as achievable.
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When I’ve gotten criticism, it’s that it’s too long, too soft, didn’t hit the government hard enough. Then when I do hit the government, they go, What’s he doing hitting the government?
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The Passion of the Christ opened up on Ash Wednesday, had a Good Friday.
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What’s so fascinating and frustrating and great about life is that you’re constantly starting over, all the time, and I love that.
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That’s the thing about jazz: it’s free flowing, it comes from your soul.
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