I’m married – I’ve caught my limit.
BILLY CRYSTALI was introducing [director and producer] Hal Roach – Mr. Roach was 100 years old, he was one of the fathers of early days in films, he put Laurel with Hardy, he created the Our Gang kids, and all these silent movies he did – he was a giant.
More Billy Crystal Quotes
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You have to always remember they’re not your own kids. Play with them, love them, spoil them to death – then hand them back.
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In high school, I was the class comedian as opposed to the class clown. The difference is the class clown is the guy who drops his pants at the football game, the class comedian is the guy who talked him into it.
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It’s money. I remember it from when I was single
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That’s why that show, no matter who hosts it, it really should be a fast-thinking comedian who is really quick on their feet that can handle situations that happen, or somebody with that kind of mentality that can capitalize on something.
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I’d like to think there is a Heaven, and it starts from the happiest day in your life.
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I was introducing [director and producer] Hal Roach – Mr. Roach was 100 years old, he was one of the fathers of early days in films, he put Laurel with Hardy, he created the Our Gang kids, and all these silent movies he did – he was a giant.
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You have to really respect what your kids are doing with their kids and how they’re raising them. You can’t push your way into areas where you shouldn’t be saying anything.
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[I did impressions] of relatives because I heard so many different sounds. My dad was in the music business and of course my uncle was a giant [music producer], but my dad in particular had the house filled with these Dixieland jazz stars.
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I don’t like heights. This is why I stopped growing at fifth grade.
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As a director and an actor, I encourage improvisation but in character and in the moment of what it is.
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It is better to look good than to feel good.
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I think when I feel I’m at my best is when I’m on stage, and it’s my version of jazz because it’s just riffing or something.
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We were in front of a live audience and I would be acting with the man who was playing my lover, and we used those words, and the audience would titter and laugh, and make me uncomfortable doing the scenes. …
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I’m comfortable being old… being black… being Jewish.
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At some point I stopped stand-up because I didn’t have something to say on a nightly basis.
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The Passion of the Christ opened up on Ash Wednesday, had a Good Friday.
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By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he’s too old to go anywhere.
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Dad had a music store, and he’d often bring home comedy albums that I would listen to. I started listening to Bob Newhart and Bill Cosby, and developing taste. They really influenced my style of comedy.
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I can’t be funny if my feet don’t feel right.
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If you do something for the first time, you will always remember it. If your Dad has something to do with it, you write about it.
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Bambi, to a kid, was scary.
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Nobody is more truthful when he’s acting than De Niro.
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Did you ever reach a point in your life, where you say to yourself, ‘This is the best I’m ever going to look, the best I’m ever going to feel, the best I’m ever going to do,’ and it ain’t that great?
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There’s only, I think, in life, three things that I do pretty well: Performing, I still can field ground balls, and I make nice kids.
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Change is such hard work.
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Good news, they found Nemo! The bad news is, they found him in one of Wolfgang Puck’s puff pastries.
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