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I like maxims that don’t encourage behavior modification.

Bill Watterson

Of course, REAL zombies never get the giggles when they look at each other.
BILL WATTERSON

Looks Other Real Zombie
I’d hate to have a kid like me.
BILL WATTERSON

Hate Kids Like
So, what’s it like in the real world? Well, the food is better, but beyond that, I don’t recommend it.
BILL WATTERSON

Graduation Real World
Even when you look for it, you’re never prepared for it.
BILL WATTERSON

Looks never Prepared
Getting an inch of snow is like winning 10 cents in the lottery.
BILL WATTERSON

Snow Winning
Calvin: Dad where do babies come from? Dad: Well Calvin, you simply go to Sears, buy the kit and follow the assembly instructions. Calvin: I came from Sears? Dad: No you were a blue-light special at K-Mart – almost as good and a lot cheaper!
BILL WATTERSON

Assembly Baby Cheaper Dad Light Sears
Hobbes: Do you think there’s a God? Calvin: Well, somebody’s out to get me!
BILL WATTERSON

Hobbes Thinking Wells
They say the secret of success is being at the right place at the right time, but since you never know when the right time is going to be, I figure the trick is to find the right place and just hang around.
BILL WATTERSON

Around Figures Hang Right Secret Tricks
I don’t think I’d have been in such a hurry to reach adulthood if I’d known the whole thing was going to be ad-libbed.
BILL WATTERSON

Adulthood Growing Thinking
Hold it. You know what I’d like to see? I’d like to see the three bears eat the three little pigs, and then the bears join up with the big bad wolf and eat Goldilocks and Little Red Riding Hood! Tell me a story like that, OK?
BILL WATTERSON

Pigs Riding Three
There are no restrictions of taste, approach, or subject matter. The gatekeepers are gone, so the prospect for new and different voices is exciting. Or at least it will be if anyone reads them.
BILL WATTERSON

Different Gatekeepers Gone Prospects Voice
Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous?
BILL WATTERSON

Ignorance Learning Waste
At school, new ideas are thrust at you every day. Out in the world, you’ll have to find your inner motivation to seek for new ideas on your own.
BILL WATTERSON

Day Every Ideas Motivation New School
Calvin: ME TARZAN! KING OF JUNGLE! Suzy: Nice underpants. Does your mom know you’re over here like this? Calvin:…I don’t think Jane EVER said that to Tarzan.
BILL WATTERSON

Country Kings Mom Nice People Think
The strips I admire go farther than a gag a day, and take us into a special world.
BILL WATTERSON

Admire Special World
Never argue with a six-year-old who shaves.
BILL WATTERSON

Argue Shaves Six Years

I like maxims that don’t encourage behavior modification.

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I like maxims that don’t encourage behavior modification.

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