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The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.

Bill Watterson

Van Gogh would’ve sold more than one painting if he’d put tigers in them.
BILL WATTERSON

Painting Solve Tigers Vans
Every time I’ve built character, I’ve regretted it.
BILL WATTERSON

Built Character Regretted
I’m killing time while I wait for life to shower me with meaning and happiness.
BILL WATTERSON

Happiness Inspirational Life
I’ll bet my autopsy reveals my mouth is too big.
BILL WATTERSON

Autopsy Bigs Mouths People
Hold it. You know what I’d like to see? I’d like to see the three bears eat the three little pigs, and then the bears join up with the big bad wolf and eat Goldilocks and Little Red Riding Hood! Tell me a story like that, OK?
BILL WATTERSON

Pigs Riding Three
You know, there are times when it’s a source of personal pride to not be human.
BILL WATTERSON

Humans Pride Source
That’s the whole problem with science. You’ve got a bunch of empiricists trying to describe things of unimaginable wonder.
BILL WATTERSON

Problem Science Trying Unimaginable
I don’t think I’d have been in such a hurry to reach adulthood if I’d known the whole thing was going to be ad-libbed.
BILL WATTERSON

Adulthood Growing Thinking
Hobbes: Do you think there’s a God? Calvin: Well, somebody’s out to get me!
BILL WATTERSON

Hobbes Thinking Wells
Look! A trickle of water running through some dirt! I’d say our afternoon just got booked solid!
BILL WATTERSON

Humorous Running Solid Water
At school, new ideas are thrust at you every day. Out in the world, you’ll have to find your inner motivation to seek for new ideas on your own.
BILL WATTERSON

Day Every Ideas Motivation New School
It’s not denial. I’m just selective about the reality I accept.
BILL WATTERSON

Beautiful Life Success
Life is full of surprises, but never when you need one.
BILL WATTERSON

Life Needs Surprise
The real fun of living wisely is that you get to be smug about it.
BILL WATTERSON

Fun Real Smug Wisely
If people sat outside and looked at the stars each night, I’ll bet they’d live a lot differently.
BILL WATTERSON

Cute Funny Life Stars
The secret to enjoying your job is to have a hobby that’s even worse
BILL WATTERSON

Hobbies Jobs Secrets
I hate to think that all my current experiences will someday become stories with no point.
BILL WATTERSON

Hate Point Stories Thinking
Calvin: Trick or treat! Adult: Where’s your costume? What are you supposed to be? Calvin: I’m yet another resource-consuming kid in an overpopulated planet.
BILL WATTERSON

Boys Kids Resources Scary Supposed
Calvin: Life’s a lot more fun when you aren’t responsible for your actions.
BILL WATTERSON

Action Fun Hobbes
I wonder if you can refuse to inherit the world.
BILL WATTERSON

Refuse Wonder World
Everybody I know fails the acid test of friendship.
BILL WATTERSON

Acid Failing Tests
Calvin: They say the world is a stage. But obviously the play is unrehearsed and everybody is ad-libbing his lines. Hobbes.
BILL WATTERSON

Numbers Play Special
No sport is less organized than Calvinball.
BILL WATTERSON

Less Organized Sports
Calvin the zombie searches for food. Horribly, the undead feed upon the living! …Although, in a pinch, a PBJ will do, if you eat it messily enough.
BILL WATTERSON

Enough Undead Zombie
Raised to an alarming extent by Madison Avenue and Hollywood, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you’re old and weak… Am I scary, or what?
BILL WATTERSON

Avenue Cynical Hollywood Poised Raised Scary
It’s psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I’ll get a saw.
BILL WATTERSON

Lobotomy Needs Saws
To invent your own life’s meaning is not easy, but it’s still allowed, and I think you’ll be happier for the trouble.
BILL WATTERSON

Accomplish Happier Happy Meaning Trouble

The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.

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The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.

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