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People who get through life dependent on other people’s possessions are always the first to lecture you on how little possessions count.

Ben Elton

We’ve all got to look at ourselves, start with yourself, that’s all you can do. I believe that we can act responsibly as a group, it’s just that there are vested interests telling us not to bother.
BEN ELTON

Believe Groups Looks
If I did things for the money, I’d have done adverts in the 1980s, when I was hot enough to be offered them, and ‘Police Academy 6,’ which I was asked to write.
BEN ELTON

Hot Police Writing
I resent the creation of a world in which beauty is a reminder of what we’re losing rather than a celebration of what we have.
BEN ELTON

Celebration Losing World
I exercise hard and the reason I do is so that I can earn the things I like to consume.
BEN ELTON

Exercise Hard Reason
This calls for a very special blend of psychology and extreme violence.
BEN ELTON

Psychology Special Violence
Kingsley watched her disappear from the room, wondering if his heart would break. Logic informed him that of course it would not. The heart was no more than a muscle, a pump which distributed blood about the body.
BEN ELTON

Blood Heart Men
Artists don’t create society, they reflect it
BEN ELTON

Artist Crete Reflect Society
I try hard not to preach, but I get carried away, which is a mistake, but it’s a risk worth running.
BEN ELTON

Mistake Risk Running
I’m easy to work with, not a pushover, but I respond to criticism and find it inspiring.
BEN ELTON

Criticism Easy Inspiring
I did not vote Labour because they’ve heard of Oasis and nobody is going to vote Tory because William Hague has got a baseball cap.
BEN ELTON

Baseball Oasis Vote
Leaders should never, ever try to look cool – that’s for dictators
BEN ELTON

Leader Looks Trying
Sympathy for victims is always counter-balanced by an equal and opposite feeling of resentment towards them.
BEN ELTON

Feelings Opposite Sympathy
You’re mugging old ladies every bit as much if you pinch their pension fund
BEN ELTON

Fund Lady Old Pension
No collection of people who are all waiting for the same thing are capable of holding a natural conversation. Even if the thing they are waiting for is only a taxi.
BEN ELTON

Natural People Waiting
The appropriation of radical thinking by lazy, self-obsessed hippies is a public relations disaster that could cost the earth.
BEN ELTON

Hippie Self Thinking
And roast beef and Yorkshire pudding is my personal signature dish.
BEN ELTON

Beef Pudding Signature

People who get through life dependent on other people’s possessions are always the first to lecture you on how little possessions count.

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People who get through life dependent on other people’s possessions are always the first to lecture you on how little possessions count.

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Popular Authors

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