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I find the fact that billionaires are quoted as if the fact that they are billionaires gives them some kind of wisdom is outrageous.

Ben Elton

Beyond love, beyond unrequited love, perhaps even beyond any other passion known to humanity, deep, deep in the depths of the turgid, clinging, swamplike pit of despair that lies dormant within every soul, lurks JEALOUSY.
BEN ELTON

Jealous Love Lying Unrequited
If only the strength of the love that people feel when it is reciprocated could be as intense and obsessive as the love we feel when it is not; then marriages would be truly made in heaven.
BEN ELTON

Love Memorable People
My advice to anyone adapting a novel is that once they’ve read it and learnt to understand it, then they must throw it away and never look at it again!
BEN ELTON

Advice Looks Novel
We’ve all got to look at ourselves, start with yourself, that’s all you can do. I believe that we can act responsibly as a group, it’s just that there are vested interests telling us not to bother.
BEN ELTON

Believe Groups Looks
You think I look like a teletubby?
BEN ELTON

Looks Thinking
The appropriation of radical thinking by lazy, self-obsessed hippies is a public relations disaster that could cost the earth.
BEN ELTON

Hippie Self Thinking
People who get through life dependent on other people’s possessions are always the first to lecture you on how little possessions count.
BEN ELTON

First Little People
Comedy will always be central to what I do, it’s just an instinct for me, but I am a writer and always have been.
BEN ELTON

Beens Comedy Instinct
I’m lucky because the strongest emotion I have ever felt is being in love, and that definitely informs my writing.
BEN ELTON

Being Love Lucky Writing
I think trying to be cool is the worst possible ambition – and I have never suffered from it.
BEN ELTON

Ambition Thinking Trying
The worst thing about being a great power is when you’re not one any more. It takes centuries to get over it.
BEN ELTON

Century Over Worst
I try hard not to preach, but I get carried away, which is a mistake, but it’s a risk worth running.
BEN ELTON

Mistake Risk Running
I resent the creation of a world in which beauty is a reminder of what we’re losing rather than a celebration of what we have.
BEN ELTON

Celebration Losing World
And of course to hunt down sedition. Only paper is safe. Books are the key. A book cannot be accessed from afar, you have to hold it, you have to read it.
BEN ELTON

Book Key Lecture Paper Read
My parents were secular. I am an atheist.
BEN ELTON

Atheist Parent Secular
Leaders should never, ever try to look cool – that’s for dictators
BEN ELTON

Leader Looks Trying
For the past seventeen years I have been experimenting with lager. I am a lager user and one drug leads to another. If you do lager, as night follows day, you’ll end up doing Kentucky Fried Chicken.
BEN ELTON

Night Past
The Germans are a cruel race. Their operas last for six hours and they have no word for fluffy.
BEN ELTON

Lasts Opera Race
The earth only has so much bounty to offer and inventing ever larger and more notional prices for that bounty does not change its real value.
BEN ELTON

Doe Real World
If I did things for the money, I’d have done adverts in the 1980s, when I was hot enough to be offered them, and ‘Police Academy 6,’ which I was asked to write.
BEN ELTON

Hot Police Writing
I exercise hard and the reason I do is so that I can earn the things I like to consume.
BEN ELTON

Exercise Hard Reason
You didn’t wake up, your dreams just changed gear.
BEN ELTON

Dream Gears Wake Up
Books are the key. A book cannot be accessed from afar. You have to hold it, you have to read it.
BEN ELTON

Book Key
You’re mugging old ladies every bit as much if you pinch their pension fund
BEN ELTON

Fund Lady Old Pension
Artists don’t create society, they reflect it
BEN ELTON

Artist Crete Reflect Society
This calls for a very special blend of psychology and extreme violence.
BEN ELTON

Psychology Special Violence
Yes, OK, farty is a silly word. I wish I’d never used it. I’m 34. Perhaps it was a word for my 20s.
BEN ELTON

Silly Stupid Wish

I find the fact that billionaires are quoted as if the fact that they are billionaires gives them some kind of wisdom is outrageous.

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I find the fact that billionaires are quoted as if the fact that they are billionaires gives them some kind of wisdom is outrageous.

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Popular Authors

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