What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
AMBROSE BIERCELogic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Accordion, n. An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.
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Optimist – A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
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Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
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Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.
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Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
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The covers of this book are too far apart.
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Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.
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Optimism – the doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
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Democracy is defended in 3 stages. Ballot Box, Jury Box, Cartridge Box.
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RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.
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Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
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Eloquence, n. The art of orally persuading fools that white is the color that it appears to be. It includes the gift of making any color appear white.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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Labor is one of the processes by which A acquires property for B.
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Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
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