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Conversation, n.: A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath is called the listener.

Ambrose Bierce

Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Death Money Person Praise Wealth
Scriptures – The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Faith Holy Ourselves Religion Scripture Writing
Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber; they fertilize.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Country Discover Fertilization Person
Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Fear Hope Ignorance Known Religion
Don’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Business Cheating Complete Steal Success
REFLECTION,n: An Action of the mind whereby we obtain a clearer view of our relation to the things of yesterday and are able to avoid the perils that we shall not again encounter.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Avoid Mindset Ourselves Reflection Relationship
The hardest tumble a man can make is to fall over his own bluff.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Fall Hard Himself Man
The covers of this book are too far apart.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Book Distance
Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Division Domain Forever Hope Present
Consul – in American politics, a person who having failed to secure an office from the people is given one by the Administration on condition that he leave the country.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Administration Condition Country Failure Himself Leaving Person Politics Security
Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Community Marriage Master Mistress Slave
What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Believe Country Democracy Oneself Ruin
Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Blessing Exception Leaving Money
Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Governement Party Prevent Rival Run
A wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Marriage People Person Support
Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Leadership Philosophy Road

Conversation, n.: A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath is called the listener.

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Conversation, n.: A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath is called the listener.

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Popular Authors

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