Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
AMBROSE BIERCEKnowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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You don’t have to be stupid to be a Christian, but it probably helps.
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Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
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Optimism – the doctrine or belief that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly.
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PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
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Age, with his eyes in the back of his head, thinks it wisdom to see the bogs through which he has floundered.
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Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
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Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.
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Wine, madam, is God’s next best gift to man.
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Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
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The only distinction that democracies reward is a high degree of conformity.
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Accordion, n. An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.
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Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber; they fertilize.
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He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity. A fool is a natural proselyte, but he must be caught young, for his convictions, unlike those of the wise, harden with age.
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Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
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Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
AMBROSE BIERCE