Women of genius commonly have masculine faces, figures and manners. In transplanting brains to an alien soil God leaves a little of the original earth clinging to the roots.
AMBROSE BIERCEPrescription: A physician’s guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.
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A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms agains himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.
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History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.
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Distance, n. The only thing that the rich are willing for the poor to call theirs and keep.
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April fool, n. The March fool with another month added to his folly.
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REALISM, n. The art of depicting nature as it is seem by toads. The charm suffusing a landscape painted by a mole, or a story written by a measuring-worm.
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Education, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.
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Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
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Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.
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Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
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Wine, madam, is God’s next best gift to man.
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In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.
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Laughter, n. An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate noises. It is infectious and, though intermittent, incurable.
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War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.
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Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.
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