Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.
AMBROSE BIERCERUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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LIFE, n. A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay. We live in daily apprehension of its loss; yet when lost it is not missed.
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The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.
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Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
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Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
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Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
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Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
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April fool, n. The March fool with another month added to his folly.
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Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.
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Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
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Optimist – A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
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Eloquence, n. The art of orally persuading fools that white is the color that it appears to be. It includes the gift of making any color appear white.
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An election is nothing more than the advanced auction of stolen goods.
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Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.
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I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.
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Laughter, n. An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate noises. It is infectious and, though intermittent, incurable.
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