They talked about unreasonable searches and seizures, about keeping the government out of their bedrooms.
AL FRANKENI think Hell exists on Earth. It’s a psychological state, or it can be a physical state.
More Al Franken Quotes
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I ask the American people not to fall victim to disinformation. There are no death panels. The Affordable Care Act cuts the deficit.
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I mean, there is a part of the media that’s not the mainstream media. That’s Fox, that is ‘The Wall Street Journal’ editorial page.
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And if those two other doctors get paid by Big Snack Food, like certain climate deniers get paid by Big Coal, I shouldn’t take their advice.
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The only job they had, which is to give accurate, objective ratings to financial products.
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When you live in New York, one of two things happen – you either become a New Yorker, or you feel more like the place you came from.
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There’s an element of that that’s either God-given, a talent that you’re not necessarily responsible for.
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I’m for Israel’s right to exist.
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Having an actual income can expand your romantic horizons toward the more appealing end of the spectrum.
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Minnesotans lost their jobs because the credit rating agencies didn’t do the only job they’re supposed to have.
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I’m a bit of a shill for the Clinton Administration, which has its perks. I’m invited to all the inaugural balls.
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My dad always told me to stand up to bullies, and Bill O’Reilly is kind of a bully, and he’s the kind of kid who hits other kids on the playground.
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I’ve spent my entire career being a satirist.
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If I put myself on the ballot and even 50 people voted for me, it’d be a travesty.
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If you look at terrorists, they really have no sense of humor.
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My dad loved comedians, especially George Jessel, and he loved Henny Youngman and Buddy Hackett.
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During the Reagan Administration, Bob Dole was present at a ceremony that included each living ex-president.
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We love America just as much as they do. But in a different way.
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I know that it’s probably not a good idea for a comedian, especially a satirist, to support a public policy group or a politician.
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Which is why I think any loving, committed couple — gay or straight — should be able to get married.
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And when you hit him, he runs to the teacher and says, ‘Teacher, sue him.’
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I’m part of the mushball middle. I consider ‘confused’ the majority position because, thankfully.
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If we have George W. Bush as president, we’re going to go back to the kind of policies we had when his father and Ronald Reagan were president.
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My dad never graduated high school. He was a printing salesman.
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Too many people don’t protect their smartphones with a password or PIN.
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The Internet can only work if it’s a truly level playing field. Small businesses should have the same ability to reach customers as powerful corporations.
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Good schools for me to prepare myself for a career, and, if I worked hard and played by the rules, a chance for me to do anything I wanted.
AL FRANKEN