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I started out being a stand up and writing my own material. That took me to Talk Soup, where I was writing and performing for TV.

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Dad Eye Give Up Material Started Writing

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

I will say that stand-up is my first love; it’s how I got started and is in my bones.
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Bone First How Love Say Stand Started Up
Pop culture hales you and wants you to fail.
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Culture Failing Fall Pop Want
I really do know football.
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Do Football Know Really
I visualize myself winning the Olympic Pentathlon, inventing a phone that can be controlled by brain waves, or doing the laundry.
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Control Doing Inventing Lying Myself Olympic Phone Visualize Wave Win Winning
I was raised by a single dad, so I’ve always just kind of liked “guys” stuff. I think my dad just took me to the things he was interested in.
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Dad Guy Kind Like Single Stuff Thinking
I’m sure I had low-level scurvy all of my childhood.
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All Childhood Level Low Scurvy Sure
Wipe the rivulets of watery drool from your face, and do it again, like an obstinate toddler running against the wall with his head in a bucket.
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Again Bucket Drool Fave Heard Rivulet Running Toddler Wall Watery
Marriage is a mystery and part of it is just being kind to each other, not being selfish.
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Be Each Just Kind Marriage Mystery Other Selfish
Pop culture is great, but it can be bad, at times.
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Bad Culture Great Pop Time
Real success and accomplishment, at whatever it is you are passionate about, requires real work.
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Accomplishment Passionate Require Running Sorry Success Wall Work
I was not one of those people who wanted to be a comedian when I was growing up. I liked comedy, but didn’t know it was something you could do for a living.
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College Comedian Growing Kid Loving People Up Wanted
I grew up on the back of a motorcycle – my dad didn’t have a car until I was a teenager. And then my closest friend from grade school was a guy.
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Back Car Dad Grade Motorcycle School Teenager
On general principle, I boycott shows that don’t employ actors.
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Actor Boycott Employ General Principle Show
Marriage isn’t a carnival ride.
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Carnival Marriage Ride
You can only really learn from failure … To win, you need to fail, and fail hard.
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Fail Failure Fun Hard Learn Need Winning
I’m just going to be the best version of me that I could possibly be and be as funny as I possibly can.
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Being Best Find Funny Going People Possibly Version
I want everyone, regardless of gender, to live a life free of restriction or fear, able to pursue their own personal brand of happiness and fulfillment.
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Battle Brand Easy Fought Fulfillment Goal Matter One Personal Really Sacrifice Worth
I’m the kindest, most supportive friend ever, probably to my own detriment, but I hope that I am toughening up a little bit.
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Friend Hope Kindest Little Own Probably Supportive
I’m black, and black don’t crack. It does droop.
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Black Crack Doe Droop
I’ve just got to be myself and hopefully people will find me. And my audience did find me.
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Audience Find Hopefully Myself People
Comedy is ugly. It’s honest, it’s raw.
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Comedy Honest Raw Ugly
Maybe the nails are a little stubby and gnawed on, but I definitely do not have man hands.
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Definitely Gnawed Hand Man Maybe Nail Stubby
I talk to grown-ups who are out to have a good time and they want to be spoken to in a different way.
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Different Good Grown Spoken Time Trying Up Want Way
I do not actually DO these things, but I see myself doing them, and that is almost MORE satisfying, because I am also lying down.
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Actually Almost Down Lying More Myself Satisfying
No one wants to hear about how awesome you were; people want to hear about the time you blew it.
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Awesome Blew Hear Need People Thinking Time Want
I love to be busy and be challenged. I’m my happiest when I’m under pressure and almost overwhelmed by how much I have to get done.
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Challenge Done Happiest Much Overwhelmed Pressure Under
I can tell you this: Stand-up is not glamorous.
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Glamorous Stand Tell Up

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