“Get off of the car,’ J.Lo huffed. ‘I am an English superstar.’ Uh-uh. There’s no comparison. ‘”

The United States was a big country where everybody wore funny t-shirts and ate too much.

Is there a short-eared koobish, then?’ Mmmyes …’ said J.Lo. ‘But it is technically not really a koobish. Is more alike a kind of singing pumpkin.’ We had conversations like these all the time, where I just eventually gave up.

Doug stiffened. Jay sounded crazy. Doug tried looking extra sane to even things out.

They can’t expect anyone to actually pay for a shirt that says, ‘I (picture of an elephant) the San Diego Zoo.’ What does that even mean?

We found the bathrooms, which were labeled ‘Aliens’ and ‘Femaliens.’ ‘Finally,’ I said to J.Lo. ‘Here’s a bathroom you’re allowed to use.

You can do terrible things when you don’t know who you are.

I’ve been punched by a vampire, an Indian girl, and a panda… I should be a video game.

What part of Canada are you from, honey?” “THE LEFT PART,” said Jay.

…Almost everything inside was filled with sugar, cheese, and weight-loss tips.

J.Lo’ in written English only has three letters, and you still spelled it ‘M-smiley face-pound sign.

The Boov frowned. ‘Everybodies always is wanting to make a clone for to doing their work.

Then it suddenly and theatrically began to clean itself in the way cats do when they want you to know what a big deal you aren’t.

YOU have no room to laugh, that’s all. I’m not doing any worse with Boovish than you did with English.’

Can I see some ID?” “WE DON’T HAVE ID,” said Jay, loudly. “‘CAUSE WE’RE CANADIAN. WE DON’T USE ID…THERE. AND THAT’S WHY WE LOOK SO YOUNG. ‘CAUSE WE’RE CANADIAN.”

Wherefor are you knowing it? If you stacked all of the Gorg in the galaxy on top of eachother, the Gorg would kill you.

I spy, with my little eye, something that starts with … G.” “Sausages.

Like most of the popular songs are today in the English language that I hear – then it would be much more of a turnoff then if it would allow me to interpret it.

I had thought for years, probably 30 or 40 years, that it would be a lot of fun to try my hand at a classic English mystery novel.

I grew up in a very British family who had been transplanted to Canada, and my grandmother’s house was filled with English books.

English bohemians sit in cold orderly rows, like carrots.

I tend to curse in French more often than I do in English.

Nowadays, anyone who cannot speak English and is incapable of using the Internet is regarded as backward.

I think maybe the English don’t want to try something and look stupid, because they are a bit reserved.

We cannot look at the Latino community and preach ‘one language.’ No one gave them an English test before they sent them to Iraq to fight for America.