“Get off of the car,’ J.Lo huffed. ‘I am an English superstar.’ Uh-uh. There’s no comparison. ‘”

I’ve been punched by a vampire, an Indian girl, and a panda… I should be a video game.

What part of Canada are you from, honey?” “THE LEFT PART,” said Jay.

…Almost everything inside was filled with sugar, cheese, and weight-loss tips.

J.Lo’ in written English only has three letters, and you still spelled it ‘M-smiley face-pound sign.

The Boov frowned. ‘Everybodies always is wanting to make a clone for to doing their work.

Then it suddenly and theatrically began to clean itself in the way cats do when they want you to know what a big deal you aren’t.

YOU have no room to laugh, that’s all. I’m not doing any worse with Boovish than you did with English.’

Can I see some ID?” “WE DON’T HAVE ID,” said Jay, loudly. “‘CAUSE WE’RE CANADIAN. WE DON’T USE ID…THERE. AND THAT’S WHY WE LOOK SO YOUNG. ‘CAUSE WE’RE CANADIAN.”

Wherefor are you knowing it? If you stacked all of the Gorg in the galaxy on top of eachother, the Gorg would kill you.

I spy, with my little eye, something that starts with … G.” “Sausages.

[J.Lo] found us a police car. Sort of. ‘It’s not a police car,’ I said. ‘It is,’ said J.Lo. ‘Looknow. Lights for flashing.’ ‘That’s true.’ ‘Writing on the sides.’ ‘Yeah, but the writing? It says ”BullShake Party Patrol.” Yes. Whatnow?

Magic likes a good tragedy, too.

I was the funny, outgoing kid who didn’t understand how he could keep getting mistaken for a nerd nobody liked.

For the gentle werelibrarian, who’s strictly vegetarian, there’s nothing like Tofillager the MEATLESS TOFU VILLAGER

There’s a little bit of magic in every box!

As far as pets go, a cat is a nice on to have.

The most powerful words in English are, ‘Tell me a story.’

I was wondering why I was put in prison for working in an African language when I had not been put in prison for working in English. So really, in prison I started thinking more seriously about the relation between language and power.

I asked a girl who came from America to England, when I was only English, and she admitted she had been to a drama school. And I said, “What did they teach you?” And she said, “They taught me to be a candle burning in an empty room.”

As far as getting work, no one thought I spoke English. It was absolutely ridiculous. I’d show up at a meeting and they’d be like, ‘Oh my God, you speak English! That’s so cool.’ They didn’t really know what to do with me.

The most powerful words in English are ‘Tell me a story,’ words that are intimately related to the complexity of history, the origins of language, the continuity of the species, the taproot of our humanity, our singularity, and art itself.

The English language on her tongue became a smoke-screen, without her eyes changing expression in the least.

I have to realise that as I am only English and am allowed to live in America, I have to give something in return. And since I cannot build a hospital, or endow a university, I can only give my infinite availability.

Blanche: No, I have the misfortune of being an English instructor. I attempt to instill a bunch of bobby-soxers and drugstore Romeos with a reverence for Hawthorne and Whitman and Poe!