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Ladies, your happiness is very important to us. You have to understand that. Because when you’re happy, you let us touch you.

Related Topics

Funny Happiness Happy Humor Important Ladies Touch

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Popular Authors

Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

What if God’s a woman? Not only am I going to hell, I’ll never know why!
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Funny God Going Hell Humor Know Reason Woman
I love that magazine, man – Victoria’s Secret – and it comes, like, every three hours.
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Every Funny Hour Humor Like Magazine Man Three
My girlfriend wants to get married. I tell you – I hope she meets somebody nice.
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Funny Girlfriend Hope Marriage Married Meet Nice She Someone Tell You
One day in the shower, you figure it out. It’s a special day in a man’s life. I was like, ‘Oh, I found me a hobby.’
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Day Figure Funny Hobby Humor Life Man Shower Special
The human body is in constant change the minute we’re born. It’s in a constant state of decay. We’re all like Ford Escorts, just falling apart.
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Born Change Constant Decay Fall Funny Humor Minute State
I talk a lot about women in my act, ’cause let’s face it — if I was hungry, I would talk about food.
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Cause Face Food Funny Humor Hungry Lot Talk Women
I think human arrogance will be the demise of civilization.
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Arrogance Civilization Demise Human Thinking
You gotta fight. You gotta get out the negative energy. Don’t let it build up. You end up screaming at each other over something totally stupid, like, ‘Well, why’d you put this spoon in this drawer then?’ ‘
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Build End Energy Fight Funny Humor Negative Screaming Stupid Up
Whenever she uses the phrase ‘I was thinking…,’ that means I either have to move, paint or buy something.
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Either Funny Humor Mean Move Moving Paint Phrase Thinking
Go to bed.’ ‘Don’t you feel like we’re soul…’
ADAM FERRARA

Bed Feel Forever Go Like Soul
Sex is important to guys. We need stories to tell our friends.
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Friend Funny Humor Important Need Sex Story Tell
I don’t think it’s fair – you get married, you give your wife a wedding ring. I think you should give her a mood ring.
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Boy Cutting Give Home Jewelry Married Mood Ring Wedding
There were many reasons we broke up. There was a religious difference: I’m a Catholic, and she’s the devil.
ADAM FERRARA

Broke Difference Funny Humor Kiss Reason Religious Room Up Walked
My pop is this big, huge man, nothing can hurt him. I went running into his bedroom like, ‘Daddy, Daddy, the boogie man’s under the bed!’ Pop opens one eye, he’s like, ‘Is the boogie man bigger than me?’ ‘
ADAM FERRARA

Bedroom Big Daddy Huge Man Pop Running
The girls are beautiful in Hollywood – and enough silicon to caulk a sink.
ADAM FERRARA

Beautiful Caulk Funny Girl Hollywood Silicon Sink
The biggest thing in my life right now is my girlfriend. I love this girl. I know I love her because she told me.
ADAM FERRARA

Biggest Funny Girl Girlfriend Humor Life Love Now Right Thing

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