I believe that the Bible is the literal word of God. And I say no, it’s not, Dad. Well, I believe that it is. Well, you know, some people believe they’re Napoleon. That’s fine. Beliefs are neat. Cherish them, but don’t share them like they’re the truth.
BILL HICKSEngland, where no one has guns: 14 deaths. United States…23,000 deaths from handguns. But – there’s no connection.
More Bill Hicks Quotes
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Rock stars against drugs–that’s what we want, isn’t it? Government-approved rock-n-roll? Woo! We’re partying now!
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It has become more and more obvious that there is one political party in America, and that is The Business Party.
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I just have one of those faces. People come up to me and say, ‘What’s wrong?’ Nothing. ‘Well, it takes more energy to frown than it does to smile.’ Yeah, you know it takes more energy to point that out than it does to leave me alone?
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I don’t do drugs anymore… than, say, the average touring funk band.
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How would you like to get inside that guy’s mind and look around for a hour? That guy sees opportunity at every glance, doesn’t he?
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Ever notice that people who believe in creationism look really unevolved? Eyes real close together, big furry hands and feet. “I believe God created me in one day.” Yeah, looks like he rushed it.
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I wouldn’t give Satan a snowball’s chance in Hell against a woman’s ego.
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In Australia…they celebrate Easter the same…by telling our children a giant bunny rabbit…left chocolate eggs in the night
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I’ve learned a lot about women. I think I’ve learned exactly how the fall of man occured in the Garden of Eden. Adam and Eve were in the Garden of Eden, and Adam said one day, Wow, Eve, here we are, at one with nature, at one with God, we’ll never age.
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Sometimes my dad even gets on this kick–‘You hate this country’….I have to tell him…I just hate being lied to.
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You’re not a human till you’re in my phone book. There. My hat is now in the political ring.
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We’re supposed to keep evolving. Evolution did not end with us growing opposable thumbs. You do know that, right?
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I love talking about the Kennedy assasination. The reason I do is because I’m fascinated by it. I’m fascinated that our government could lie to us so blatantly, so obviously for so long, and we do absolutely nothing about it. I think that’s interesting in what is ostensibly a democracy.
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I need my sleep. I need about eight hours a day, and about ten at night.
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…I just want to be free of the fears and anxieties and the superstitions of religion. An ‘avenging GOD’? One who created Hell for those who don’t believe?
BILL HICKS