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Keith Richards outlived Jim Fixx, the runner and health-nut dude. The plot thickens.

Bill Hicks

I believe we all have the Voice of Reason inside us…to gently lead us out of our own self-created hells.
BILL HICKS

Believe Self Voice
If you’re so pro-life, do me a favour: don’t lock arms and block medical clinics. If you’re so pro-life, lock arms and block cemeteries.
BILL HICKS

Block Cemeteries Funny Humor
Rock stars against drugs–that’s what we want, isn’t it? Government-approved rock-n-roll? Woo! We’re partying now!
BILL HICKS

Approved Party Rocks Stars
Listen, the next revolution is gonna be a revolution of ideas.
BILL HICKS

Ideas Next Revolutionary
I go to dance clubs…about once a year just to justify the other 364 days I spend in my apartment going ‘God, what idiots!’
BILL HICKS

Apartment Clubs Idiots Years
The definition of black irony is Pro-lifers killing Doctors who do abortions
BILL HICKS

Doctor Funny Humor
A world where greed is our God and wisdom is sin, where division is key and unity is fantasy, where the ego-driven cleverness of the mind is praised, rather than the intelligence of the heart.
BILL HICKS

Division God Greed Heart Intelligence
I’ll smoke, I’ll cough, I’ll get the tumors, I’ll die, deal? Thank you America. [salutes]
BILL HICKS

Country Deals Salute
Women priests. Great, great. Now there’s priests of both sexes I don’t listen to.
BILL HICKS

Atheist Funny Sex
The war on drugs to me is absolutely phoney, its so obviously phoney, ok? It’s a war against our civil rights, that’s all it is. They’re using it to make us afraid to go out at night, afraid of each other, so that we lock ourselves in our homes and they get suspending our rights one by one.
BILL HICKS

Afraid Home Night Suspending War
You know, when I see those two twins on that Doublemint commercial? I’m not thinking of gum. I am thinking of chewing, so maybe that’s the connection they’re trying to make.
BILL HICKS

Connection Make Trying
May I suggest, instead of a war to feel better about yourself, perhaps… sit-ups? Maybe a fruit cup? Eight glasses of water a day?
BILL HICKS

Day Glasses Perhaps Water
I was a weekend drinker…I’d start on Saturday, end on Friday…thought I was controlling it…but I don’t drink any more.
BILL HICKS

Drink Friday Weekend
People are bringing SHOTGUNS to UFO sightings…brings a whole new meaning to that phrase ‘You ain’t from around here, ar’ya?’
BILL HICKS

People Phrases Shotguns
Mummy, I woke today and there was a Lincoln Log in me sock drawer! … That’s the story of Jesus.
BILL HICKS

Jesus Stories Today
I had a great time doing drugs. Sorry. Never murdered anyone, never robbed anyone, never raped anyone, never beat anyone, never lost a job, a car, a house, a wife or kids, laughed my ass off, and went about my day.
BILL HICKS

Anyone Doing Kid Murdered Robbed Sorry Taught

Keith Richards outlived Jim Fixx, the runner and health-nut dude. The plot thickens.

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Keith Richards outlived Jim Fixx, the runner and health-nut dude. The plot thickens.

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Popular Authors

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