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Without arts programmes there’s only reality TV, and reality TV needs the arts to show it what reality is.

Billy Connolly

The human race has been set up. Someone, somewhere, is playing a practical joke on us. Apparently, women need to feel loved to have sex. Men need to have sex to feel loved. How do we ever get started.
BILLY CONNOLLY

Apparently Men Race Sex Women
Never trust people who’ve only got one book.
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Book never People Trust
I used to have Mad Cow’s disease, but I’m alright Nooooooooow.
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Alright Disease Humorous Mad
If you want to lose a bit of weight, don’t eat anything out of a bucket.
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Buckets Lose Utensils Weight
When people say “it’s always the last place you look”. Of course it is. Why would you keep looking after you’ve found it?
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Funny Humor Look People Place
I think of my life as a series of moments and I’ve found that the great moments often don’t have too much to them.
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Huge Love Simply Thinking You
There’s no such thing as bad weather – only the wrong clothes.
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Adventure Being Happy Running
I’ve always liked it here. Part of me is Irish. My family comes from the west coast, so whenever I come to Ireland I get a wee tingling in my heart that I’m where I belong.
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Coast Country Family Heart West
I hate those earnest TV documentaries that are the world according to people with glasses who know better than you.
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Documentaries Glasses Hate People
The only time I would like to see was the 20s and 30s in America because I love the music and the style and the optimism, I wanted to see New York being built. I wanted to see all that, you know.
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Country Music Optimism People Wanter
If you give people a chance, they shine.
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Giving People Shining
I spent the whole time battering people I liked and singing with my arm round people I loathed.
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Arms Loathed People Singing Single
American sex shops are the most bizarre. They sell these inflatable dolls, but they also sell just the head — supposedly for people to drive along the highway with.
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Dolls People Sex Suppose
I don’t have wild dogs chasing people with scripts away from my door. I get my share. I’ve done okay. But I usually do independent stuff because that’s mostly what I’m offered.
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Dog Doors Independent Stuff
Tread gently on anyone who looks at you sideways.
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Gently Looks Sideway Tread
didn’t even know there were specialist zombie magazines and clubs. I heard the other day that a radio station had asked people if they`d made preparations for an attack by zombies, and a staggering number of people replied yes!
BILLY CONNOLLY

Club Magazines Number People Radio Station

Without arts programmes there’s only reality TV, and reality TV needs the arts to show it what reality is.

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Without arts programmes there’s only reality TV, and reality TV needs the arts to show it what reality is.

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Popular Authors

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