You wanna get the truth out of me, get me hammered.
RON WHITEThe Majestic Theatre in San Antone is as good as it gets.
More Ron White Quotes
-
-
I love Cincinnati, but you can keep that spaghetti chili product!
RON WHITE -
All of my comedian friends are some of the best joke writers in the world.
RON WHITE -
I was a little one-trick pony. I do what I’ve always done. That’s really where my best stuff comes from. I don’t know how it happens. It just happens.
RON WHITE -
I write all of my material. It’s all me.
RON WHITE -
The Majestic Theatre in San Antone is as good as it gets.
RON WHITE -
My brain is like a cross between a colander and a Lazy Susan – thin, slow, and it leaks.
RON WHITE -
I’ve got a great cigar collection – it’s actually not a collection, because that would imply I wasn’t going to smoke every last one of ’em.
RON WHITE -
Here’s how I operate. When I see something I like, 20 years later, I ask her brother for her phone number. She don’t even see me coming.
RON WHITE -
I was a comedy fan when I was a little kid.
RON WHITE -
We always go out looking for live music after our shows.
RON WHITE -
There have been times when I played more than others, but I’ve been a road comic for a quarter of a century, so I’ve always played golf on the road because you have a lot of time to kill.
RON WHITE -
I don’t have a specific plan except for as long as people want to listen to me talk, I’m going to keep talking. I can’t imagine a life without doing standup.
RON WHITE -
Other states are trying to abolish the death penalty… mine’s putting in an express lane.
RON WHITE -
I would have rather been beat by a plumber than Kathy Griffin.
RON WHITE -
Diamonds – that’ll shut her up… for a minute!
RON WHITE