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Am I going to complain about being typecast as smart? I don’t think so.

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No one wants to hear about how awesome you were; people want to hear about the time you blew it.
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One thing we do really well on Archer and one thing I’ve always tried to do in my comedy and my writing and my podcast is to never speak down to my audience.
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Real success and accomplishment, at whatever it is you are passionate about, requires real work.
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I’m sure I had low-level scurvy all of my childhood.
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Maybe the nails are a little stubby and gnawed on, but I definitely do not have man hands.
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I have one girlfriend who is dating right now – she’s divorced – and she’s on Tinder, so we play Tinder. I know that’s not a real game, but it’s my favorite thing to do.
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If you ever needed to ruin someone’s fun, I mean really poop a party, just move things to the workplace. Fun terminated.
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It is hard, it lasts all day, the lighting is generally fluorescent, and, apparently, drinking at your desk is frowned upon.
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Omnipresence can be a good or bad thing, I suppose. I don’t want to spend a lot of time thinking about it. I’m super-grateful.
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After going through a lot of procedures and spending a lot of money … the doctor said, ‘Look, based on what we’re seeing here, I just don’t think this is going to happen for you.’
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I really do know football.
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I don’t believe in superheroes but I love Batman movies. There’s a part of every person that is entertained by the idealistic, the fantastic.
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You just have to keep getting up’. And I look back and they were right. They were all right.
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I am absolutely a Giants fan and I’m a Dynasty baby so I was a 49ers fan for a long time.
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