black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.

Ambrose Bierce

Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Food Place Religion Service State
ARMOR, n. The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Blacksmith Cloth Kind Man
Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Governement Party Prevent Rival Run
Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Community Marriage Master Mistress Slave
True, man does not know woman. But neither does woman.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Man Philosophy True Woman
A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms agains himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Convincing Doubt Enemy Man Person
Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Final Funny Rich
Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Arrangement Classification Ignorance Knowledge Small
Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Ambition Himself Name Patriot
Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.
AMBROSE BIERCE

God Man One Liner Reason Sleep
Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Democracy Lamb Lunch Vote Wolf
History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Fake Fools History Important Rule
Labor is one of the processes by which A acquires property for B.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Labor Pregnant Property
Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Angry Best Regret Talk Yourself
Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Animal Digest Eat Goodness Man Science
Prescription: A physician’s guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.
AMBROSE BIERCE

Harm Patient Prescription Situation

Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Ambrose Bierce Quotes