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What I appreciate is acknowledging to the audience that I think they have brains.

Lily Tomlin

I bought a box of animal crackers, but there was nothing inside. They’d eaten each other.
LILY TOMLIN

Animal Eat Food Funny Myself
Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest – then we can all die laughing.
LILY TOMLIN

Death Laughter Smart Survive Work
No matter how cynical you become, it’s never enough to keep up.
LILY TOMLIN

Change Enough Myself Transformation
Wouldn’t it be great if we all grew up to be what we wanted to be? The world would be full of nurses, firemen, and ballerinas.
LILY TOMLIN

Greatness Growth World
I can handle reality in small doses, but as a lifestyle, it’s much too confining.
LILY TOMLIN

Life Myself Reality Small Style
But there are too many people that make so much money at the cost of lives of other humans and for no reason but to make the money.
LILY TOMLIN

Cost Live Money People Reason
Exercise is for people who can’t handle drugs or alcohol.
LILY TOMLIN

Alcohol Control Drugs Exercise People
If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?
LILY TOMLIN

Love Question Yourself
I think life is perverse. It can be beautiful, but it won’t.
LILY TOMLIN

Beautiful Life Myself Pervert Thinking
The start to a better world is the belief that it is possible.
LILY TOMLIN

Belief Better Possible Start World
If evolution was worth its salt, it should’ve evolved something better than ‘survival of the fittest.’ I think a better idea would be ‘survival of the wittiest.’ At least, that way, creatures that didn’t survive could’ve died laughing.
LILY TOMLIN

Better Creature Death Evolution Laughter Survive Worth
9 to 5 made people aware of equal pay for equal work. It hasn’t really happened, but it has come closer.
LILY TOMLIN

Equality Money Pay People Work
Infinity is just time on an ego trip.
LILY TOMLIN

Ego Infinity One Liner Time Trip
Being a New Yorker is never having to say you are sorry.
LILY TOMLIN

Place Sorry Yourself
Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain.
LILY TOMLIN

Complain Invention Language Man Satisfaction
Growing up in Michigan was fine, until I realized where I was.
LILY TOMLIN

Born Growth Myself Place

What I appreciate is acknowledging to the audience that I think they have brains.

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What I appreciate is acknowledging to the audience that I think they have brains.

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Popular Authors

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