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I just downloaded eleven hundred books onto my Kindle, and now I can’t lift it.

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Dinosaurs did not walk with humans. The evolutionary record says different. They gambled.
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There’s no better way to learn something than to learn it in front of an audience. Your terror drives you.
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Always do business as if the person you’re doing business with is trying to screw you, because he probably is. And if he’s not, you can be pleasantly surprised.
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I will do anything to look like him – except, of course, exercise or eat right.
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With comedy, you never know until you put it in front of an audience. You shoot it and a year later you have no idea if it’s going to work. And then you get the response. It’s great when it’s good.
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When I die, now don’t think that I’m a nut, don’t want no fancy funeral, just one like old King Tut.
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Acting is collaborative because you are working with another actor, and it’s almost like a two-man juggling team. You have to really be in sync.
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Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.
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The greatest thing you can do is surprise yourself.
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I believe the United States should allow all foreigners in this country, provided they can speak our native language… Apache.
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The conscious mind is the editor, and the subconscious mind is the writer.
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I believe in equality. Equality for everybody. No matter how stupid they are or how superior I am to them.
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Writer’s block is a fancy term made up by whiners so they can have an excuse to drink alcohol.
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All I’ve ever wanted was an honest week’s pay for an honest day’s work.
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Teaching is, after all, a form of show business.
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