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Spring is nature’s way of saying, ‘Let’s party!’

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I always thought the idea of education was to learn to think for yourself.
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Make your life spectacular, I know I did.
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What some folks call impossible is just stuff they haven’t seen before.
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Don’t associate yourself with toxic people. It’s better to be alone and love yourself than surrounded by people that make you hate yourself.
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She is not perfect. You are not perfect. The question is whether or not you are perfect for each other.
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The great thing about marriage is the idea of really getting to know someone. And really getting to know a woman is a life long task.
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I wonder what chairs think about all day: “Oh, here comes another asshole
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Self-reliance is the key to a vigorous life. A man must look inward to find his own answers.
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Some are born great. Some achieve greatness. Some get it as a graduation gift.
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Cricket is basically baseball on valium.
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If women ran the world, we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.
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But only in their dreams can men be truly free. It was always thus and always thus will be.
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People say satire is dead. It’s not dead; it’s alive and living in the White House.
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Compassionate conservative. I don’t know what that is, it sounds like a Volvo with a gun rack.
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Never pick a fight with an ugly person, they’ve got nothing to lose.
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A human life is just a heartbeat in heaven.
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