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The definition of eternity is two people and a ham.

Dorothy Parker

All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends.
DOROTHY PARKER

Enough Friendship Need Room
You can’t teach an old dogma new tricks.
DOROTHY PARKER

Old Teaching Trick Yourself
A girl’s best friend is her mutter.
DOROTHY PARKER

Best Friendship Girl Herself
Genius can write on the back of old envelopes but mere talent requires the finest stationery available.
DOROTHY PARKER

Genius Material Talent Writing
Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
DOROTHY PARKER

Acceptance Leaving Myself
Genius can write on the back of old envelopes but mere talent requires the finest stationery available.
DOROTHY PARKER

Genius Material Talent Writing
If all the girls attending [the Yale prom] were laid end to end, I wouldn’t be at all surprised.
DOROTHY PARKER

End Surprise Woman
It’s not the tragedies that kill us; it’s the messes.
DOROTHY PARKER

Kill Mess Myself Tragedy
Misfortune, and recited misfortune especially, can be prolonged to the point where it ceases to excite pity and arouses only irritation.
DOROTHY PARKER

Excitement Fortune Irritation
The writer’s way is rough and lonely, and who would choose it while there are vacancies in more gracious professions, such as, say, cleaning out ferryboats?
DOROTHY PARKER

Clean Professional Way Writing
Most good women are hidden treasures who are only safe because nobody looks for them.
DOROTHY PARKER

Goodness Hide Safety Treasure Woman
If you looked for things to make you feel hurt and wretched and unnecessary, you were certain to find them.
DOROTHY PARKER

Feeling Hurt Necessary Yourself
I don’t mind anything that’s written about me, as long as it’s not true.
DOROTHY PARKER

Mindset True Writing
What ever beauty may be it has for its basis order and for its essence unity Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.
DOROTHY PARKER

Beautiful Clean Deep Order Skin Ugly
I can’t write five words but that I change seven.
DOROTHY PARKER

Change Myself Word Writing
I require only three things of a man. He must be handsome, ruthless and stupid.
DOROTHY PARKER

Man Myself Relationship Requirement Stupidity

The definition of eternity is two people and a ham.

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The definition of eternity is two people and a ham.

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