Cleaning the house while the children are home is like shoveling while it’s still snowing.
ERMA BOMBECKI’ve exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
-
-
Friends are “annuals” that need seasonal nurturing to bear blossoms. Family is a “perennial” that comes up year after year, enduring the droughts of absence and neglect. There’s a place in the garden for both of them.
ERMA BOMBECK -
A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween.
ERMA BOMBECK -
It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.
ERMA BOMBECK -
For years, my husband and I have advocated separate vacations. But the kids keep finding us.
ERMA BOMBECK -
Grandparenthood is one of life’s rewards for surviving your own children.
ERMA BOMBECK -
The grass is always greener over the septic tank.
ERMA BOMBECK -
Housework, if it is done properly, can cause brain damage.
ERMA BOMBECK -
My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.
ERMA BOMBECK -
Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It’s too controversial.
ERMA BOMBECK -
Good kids are like sunsets. We take them for granted. Every evening they disappear. Most parents never imagine how hard they try to please us, and how miserable they feel when they think they have failed.
ERMA BOMBECK -
When the going gets tough, the tough make cookies.
ERMA BOMBECK -
Guilt: the gift that keeps on giving.
ERMA BOMBECK -
Maybe age is kinder to us than we think. With my bad eyes, I can’t see how bad I look, and with my rotten memory, I have a good excuse for getting out of a lot of stuff.
ERMA BOMBECK -
Onion rings in the car cushions do not improve with time.
ERMA BOMBECK -
Housework can kill you if done right.
ERMA BOMBECK