He who laughs lasts.
ERMA BOMBECKGood kids are like sunsets. We take them for granted. Every evening they disappear. Most parents never imagine how hard they try to please us, and how miserable they feel when they think they have failed.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
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It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.
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When the going gets tough, the tough make cookies.
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Time. It hangs heavy for the bored, eludes the busy, flies by the for young, and runs out for the aged.
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Sometimes I can’t figure designers out. It’s as if they flunked human anatomy.
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A grandparent will help you with your buttons, your zippers, and your shoelaces and not be in any hurry for you to grow up.
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Housework, if it is done properly, can cause brain damage.
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When humor goes, there goes civilization.
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As a child, my number one best friend was the librarian in my grade school. I actually believed all those books belonged to her.
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If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
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Pregnancy is the only time in a woman’s life she can help God work a miracle.
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If I had my life to live over, instead of wishing away nine months of pregnancy, I’d have cherished ever moment and realized that the wonderment growing inside me was the only chance in life to assist God in a miracle.
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All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.
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I worry about scientists discovering that lettuce has been fattening all along.
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A member of the committee slapped a name tag over my left bosom. “What shall we name the other one?” I smiled. She was not amused.
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Volunteers are the only human beings on the face of the earth who reflect this nation’s compassion, unselfish caring, patience, and just plain love for one another.
ERMA BOMBECK







