Some weasel took the cork out of my lunch.
W. C. FIELDSI am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.
More W. C. Fields Quotes
-
-
Wouldn’t it be terrible if I quoted some reliable statistics which prove that more people are driven insane through religious hysteria than by drinking alcohol.
W. C. FIELDS -
The only thing a lawyer won’t question is the legitimacy of his mother.
W. C. FIELDS -
Never give a sucker an even break.
W. C. FIELDS -
If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.
W. C. FIELDS -
Anyone who hates children and animals can’t be all bad.
W. C. FIELDS -
Sleep! The most beautiful experience in life. Except drink.
W. C. FIELDS -
When life hands you lemons, make whisky sours.
W. C. FIELDS -
I personally stay away from natural foods. At my age I need all the preservatives I can get.
W. C. FIELDS -
I certainly do not drink all the time. I have to sleep you know.
W. C. FIELDS -
I never smoked a cigar in my life until I was nine.
W. C. FIELDS -
I’m free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
W. C. FIELDS -
I cook with wine, sometimes I even add it to the food.
W. C. FIELDS -
I don’t believe in dining on an empty stomach.
W. C. FIELDS -
When doctors and undertakers meet, they wink at each other.
W. C. FIELDS -
There comes a time in the affairs of man when he must take the bull by the tail and face the situation.
W. C. FIELDS