The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited breath.
W. C. FIELDSI am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.
More W. C. Fields Quotes
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I drink with impunity, or anyone else who invites me.
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Attitude is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than what people do or say. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill.
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It’s a funny old world. A man’s lucky if he gets out of it alive.
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I am an expert of electricity. My father occupied the chair of applied electricity at the state prison.
W. C. FIELDS -
I used to be indecisive, now I’m not so sure.
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During one of my treks through Afghanistan, we lost our corkscrew. We were compelled to live on food and water for several days.
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Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 3000 B. C.
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Alcoholic: anybody who drinks more than I do.
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Reality is an illusion that occurs due to the lack of alcohol.
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It ain’t what they call you, it’s what you answer to.
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Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
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Drat! Being the encapsulated view of life.
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Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There’s nothing like having a midget for a butler.
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Few things in life are more embarrassing than the necessity of having to inform an old friend that you have just got engaged to his fiancee.
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I don’t drink water. Have you seen the way it rusts pipes?
W. C. FIELDS