I can’t possibly take time off for a second baby, unless I do, in which case that is nobody’s business and I’ll never regret it for a moment unless it ruins my life.
TINA FEYLesson learned? When people say, “You really, really must” do something, it means you don’t really have to. No one ever says, “You really, really must deliver the baby during labor.” When it’s true, it doesn’t need to be said.
More Tina Fey Quotes
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To say I’m an overrated troll, when you have never even seen me guard a bridge, is patently unfair.
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In real life, people in the most dire situations must cope through humor.
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Nothing is creepier than a bunch of adults being very quiet.
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Read! When your baby is finally down for the night, pick up a juicy book like Eat, Pray, Love or Pride and Prejudice or my personal favorite,Understanding Sleep Disorders: Narcolepsy and Apnea.
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To me YES, AND means don’t be afraid to contribute. Always make sure you’re adding something to the discussion. Your initiations are worthwhile.
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In Washington, officials from the National Rifle Association met with a group of high school students. There were no survivors.
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I was first in my class at Johns Hopkins, so?” Make statements, with your actions and your voice.
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The arms of Michelle Obama, and doll tits. The person closest to actually achieving this look is Kim Kardashian, who, as we know, was made by Russian scientists to sabotage our athletes.
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I like to crack the jokes now and again, but it’s only because I struggle with math.
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In a study, scientists report that drinking beer can be good for the liver. I’m sorry, did I say ‘scientists’? I meant Irish people.
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Don’t be too precious or attached to anything you write. Let things be malleable.
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There are a couple of things I want to impart to ladies who want to be in comedy: One, you don’t have to be weird or be quirky to get your job done. And two, comedy skill is not sexually transmittable.
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(Some people say “Never let them see you cry.” I say, if you’re so mad you could just cry, then cry. It terrifies everyone.)
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Politics and prostitution have to be the only jobs where inexperience is considered a virtue.
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I am going to dedicate myself, full time, to my day-drinking.
TINA FEY