Don’t have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them.
STEVE MARTINI have found that– just as in real life–imagination sometimes has to stand in for experience.
More Steve Martin Quotes
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Always make room for the unexpected in yourself.
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I could never be a woman, ’cause I’d just stay home and play with my breasts all day.
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Chaos in the midst of chaos isn’t funny, but chaos in the midst of order is.
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I was deeply unhappy, but I didn’t know it because I was so happy all the time.
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Thankfully, perseverance is a good substitute for talent.
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I guess I wouldn’t believe in anything if it weren’t for my lucky astrology mood watch.
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I will do anything to look like him – except, of course, exercise or eat right.
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No art comes from the conscious mind.
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Some nights, alone, he thinks of her, and some nights, alone, she thinks of him. Some night these thoughts, separated by miles and time zones, occur at the same objective moment, and Ray and Mirabelle are connected without ever knowing it.
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How to make a million dollars: First, get a million dollars.
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Dinosaurs did not walk with humans. The evolutionary record says different. They gambled.
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I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.
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Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.
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A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
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I believe in equality. Equality for everybody. No matter how stupid they are or how superior I am to them.
STEVE MARTIN