There’s no backlog of people we can fire for no reason and act as if they don’t exist.
RON WHITEThat’s the beauty of being a straight-to-DVD star. It really helps you stay under the media’s radar.
More Ron White Quotes
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My brain is like a cross between a colander and a Lazy Susan – thin, slow, and it leaks.
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Donald Trump – and I don’t dislike Donald one single bit – has no idea how good the Mexican people are at building tunnels.
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I have a very fun life. I don’t recommend it for anybody else, but it sure has been fun for me.
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I believe that a bad Super Bowl halftime show is still better than a soccer game.
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The only thing I really worry about is my live stand-up show because I have to answer to the fans.
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I don’t know who in my family thinks very fast at all, including me. The things that people see me do onstage are written, so it doesn’t have to be very quick if you have all day with a pen.
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Here’s how I operate. When I see something I like, 20 years later, I ask her brother for her phone number. She don’t even see me coming.
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The bulk of my fans are my age, and I’m aging at the same rate they are. That makes me relevant. They like hearing what I have to say. I work hard at it, but it’s addicting, really.
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I don’t think we have a surplus of fine educators in this country that we can just start dropping them for no reason whatsoever.
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There’s not a pill you can take; there’s not a class you can go to. Stupid is forever.
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I think honest communication, no matter where it comes from, is positive for a relationship.
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People, when they go on stage, tend to be animated and try to force things out instead of relaxing and bringing it in.
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My life has been wild enough to derive all of the stories you need out of it. I’ve been through many, many years of behavioral problems, so I don’t really look outside for stories.
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I think the world has their own good, clean, Christian comedy. They don’t need my help.
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A lot of people can find something to laugh at in my humor, I guess.
RON WHITE