You can’t love your team without hating another team.
NORM MACDONALDInstead of loving your enemies, have no enemies to love.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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Envy, like a false mirror, distorts the symmetry of the sweetest form.
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Liberty, like health, appears most precious when lost.
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It is vain to complain of fortune while we fail in policy and conduct.
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In love, we are best pleased when we please others.
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I always told everybody the perfect joke would be where the setup and punch line were identical.
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Yeah man, they call gambling a disease, but it’s the only disease where you can win a bunch of money.
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The standard of morals is as variable as morals themselves; of which every nation has a different code, and every custom a different reading.
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Back in the old days, a man could just get sick and die. Now they have to wage a battle. So my Uncle Bert is waging a courageous battle, which I’ve seen, because I go and visit him. And this is the battle: he’s lying in the hospital bed, with a thing in his arm, watching Matlock on the TV.
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When I hear a guy lost a battle to cancer, that really did bother me, that that’s a term. It implies that he failed and that somebody else that defeated cancer is heroic and courageous.
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All that weak people learn from disappointment, is less confidence in future enterprise.
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Note to self: no matter how bad life gets, there’s always beer.
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The praise we seek for our own virtues sometimes tempts us to flatter the imperfections of other men.
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Reason is always weak where prejudice is strong.
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Few are more unhappy than those who have great ambition, but little energy to urge it into activity.
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Some people are so much afraid of being deceived, that they never venture to trust; like misers, their avarice destroys their gain.
NORM MACDONALD