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Exercise is for people who can’t handle drugs or alcohol.

Lily Tomlin

I have always felt that humor was a wonderful vehicle to let us become connected with each other and ourselves; I try to portray the similarities and polarities in men and women, so that we can acknowledge and embrace our collective consciousness.
LILY TOMLIN

Collection Conscious Feeling Humor Vehicle Wonderful
Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest – then we can all die laughing.
LILY TOMLIN

Death Laughter Smart Survive Work
The phone company handles 84 billion calls a year-everything from kings, queens, and presidents to the scum of the earth.
LILY TOMLIN

Company Earth Name Phone Standard
If beauty is truth, why don’t women go to the library to have their hair done?
LILY TOMLIN

Beautiful Hairs Library Woman
There will be sex after death, we just won’t be able to feel it.
LILY TOMLIN

Death Feeling Sex
The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.
LILY TOMLIN

Deep Race Trouble Win Yourself
We are all in this together, by ourselves.
LILY TOMLIN

Ourselves Togetherness
What goes up must come down. But don’t expect it to come down where you can find it.
LILY TOMLIN

Expectation Philosophy Yourself
There’s nothing sadder than getting to the end of your life and saying, ‘I didn’t do it right’.
LILY TOMLIN

End Life Regret Right Sad Yourself
If life is so meaningless, then why are we always bringing it up?
LILY TOMLIN

Hypocrisy Life Meaning
The larger picture is really to swing people’s awareness of what really is moral.
LILY TOMLIN

Moral People Photograph
You are what you think, geez, that’s frightening.
LILY TOMLIN

Fear Thinking Yourself
If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?
LILY TOMLIN

Beautiful Funny Hairs Library Truth
Even when I’m being funny, I’m deadly serious.
LILY TOMLIN

Death Funny Myself Serious
I always wondered why somebody doesn’t do something about that. Then I realized I was somebody.
LILY TOMLIN

Action Deep Inspirational Motivational Myself
There’s so much plastic in this culture that vinyl leopard skin is becoming an endangered synthetic.
LILY TOMLIN

Culture Fabric Skin

Exercise is for people who can’t handle drugs or alcohol.

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Exercise is for people who can’t handle drugs or alcohol.

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