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Sometimes I feel like a figment of my own imagination.

Lily Tomlin

The phone company handles 84 billion calls a year-everything from kings, queens, and presidents to the scum of the earth.
LILY TOMLIN

Company Earth Name Phone Standard
I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.
LILY TOMLIN

Career Important Myself Regret
Every day I read the newspapers, and no matter how cynical I get, it’s imposssible to keep up.
LILY TOMLIN

Impossible Myself News Reading
Did you know, throughout the cosmos they found intelligent life forms that play to play? We are the only ones that play to win. Explains why we have more than our share of losers.
LILY TOMLIN

Form Intelligence Life Lose Play Share Space Win
You know being relevant or coming up with something interesting, funny to say about what’s current is just as hard as it might ever be depending on the serendipity of it all.
LILY TOMLIN

Funny Hard Interest Talk Yourself
Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest – then we can all die laughing.
LILY TOMLIN

Death Laughter Smart Survive Work
Maybe if people started to listen, history would stop repeating itself.
LILY TOMLIN

History Listening People Repeat Start Stop
Language was invented because of the deep human need to complain.
LILY TOMLIN

Complain Human Invention Language
For fast-acting relief try slowing down.
LILY TOMLIN

Down Fast relief Slow Try
We are all in this together, by ourselves.
LILY TOMLIN

Ourselves Togetherness
When I am happy I feel like crying, but when I am sad I don’t feel like laughing. I think it is better to be happy; then you get two feelings for the price of one.
LILY TOMLIN

Better Cry Feeling Happiness Laughter Price Sad
If I had known what it would be like to have it all – I might have been willing to settle for less.
LILY TOMLIN

Fame Myself Settle Willing
When I’ve had a meltdown, people will say to me, “Well, you failed to keep your sense of humor.”
LILY TOMLIN

Failure Humor Myself People Talk Yourself
If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?
LILY TOMLIN

Beautiful Funny Hairs Library Truth
The start to a better world is the belief that it is possible.
LILY TOMLIN

Belief Better Possible Start World
The larger picture is really to swing people’s awareness of what really is moral.
LILY TOMLIN

Moral People Photograph

Sometimes I feel like a figment of my own imagination.

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Sometimes I feel like a figment of my own imagination.

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