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If you have a dog or a cat, you know how developed they can be. How sensitive, how aware. They suffer. We all do.

Lily Tomlin

When I’ve had a meltdown, people will say to me, “Well, you failed to keep your sense of humor.”
LILY TOMLIN

Failure Humor Myself People Talk Yourself
After all, in private, we’re all misfits.
LILY TOMLIN

One Liner Privacy
If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library?
LILY TOMLIN

Beautiful Funny Hairs Library Truth
When I am happy I feel like crying, but when I am sad I don’t feel like laughing. I think it is better to be happy; then you get two feelings for the price of one.
LILY TOMLIN

Better Cry Feeling Happiness Laughter Price Sad
If evolution was worth its salt, it should’ve evolved something better than ‘survival of the fittest.’ I think a better idea would be ‘survival of the wittiest.’ At least, that way, creatures that didn’t survive could’ve died laughing.
LILY TOMLIN

Better Creature Death Evolution Laughter Survive Worth
For fast-acting relief try slowing down.
LILY TOMLIN

Down Fast relief Slow Try
People hire me to create some kind of archetype or some culture type, or something. I guess they accept whatever I come up with.
LILY TOMLIN

Acceptance Creation Kind Myself People
Remember we’re all in this alone.
LILY TOMLIN

Alone One Liner Remember
There’s so much plastic in this culture that vinyl leopard skin is becoming an endangered synthetic.
LILY TOMLIN

Culture Fabric Skin
Growing up in Michigan was fine, until I realized where I was.
LILY TOMLIN

Born Growth Myself Place
I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.
LILY TOMLIN

Career Important Myself Regret
The road to success is always under construction.
LILY TOMLIN

Construction Inspirational Road Success
Lady, I do not make up things. That is lies. Lies are not true. But the truth could be made up if yo know how. And that’s the truth.
LILY TOMLIN

Lying Make Up True Yourself
I was always drawn to more the social-expression-of-culture types.
LILY TOMLIN

Culture Expression Myself Social Type
I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework.
LILY TOMLIN

Home Myself Teacher Thinking
I bought a box of animal crackers, but there was nothing inside. They’d eaten each other.
LILY TOMLIN

Animal Eat Food Funny Myself
Did you know, in the entire universe, we are the only intelligent life forms thought to have a Miss Universe contest?
LILY TOMLIN

Form Intelligence Life Universe Yourself
Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.
LILY TOMLIN

Leadership Reality Touch
I guess if people couldn’t profit from war I don’t think there would be war.
LILY TOMLIN

Myself People Profit Thinking War
I can handle reality in small doses, but as a lifestyle, it’s much too confining.
LILY TOMLIN

Life Myself Reality Small Style
If you can’t be direct, why be?
LILY TOMLIN

Direct Yourself
If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?
LILY TOMLIN

Love Question Yourself
Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.
LILY TOMLIN

Hard Time Struggle Worst
Ninety eight percent of the adults in this country are decent, hardworking, honest Americans. It’s the other lousy two percent that get all the publicity. But then, we elected them.
LILY TOMLIN

Adult Country Election Hard Work
Did you know, throughout the cosmos they found intelligent life forms that play to play? We are the only ones that play to win. Explains why we have more than our share of losers.
LILY TOMLIN

Form Intelligence Life Lose Play Share Space Win
No matter how cynical you become, it’s never enough to keep up.
LILY TOMLIN

Change Enough Myself Transformation
In the depths of the night, fear grips my heart. It paralyzes my mind. But most of all, I feel very, very alone
LILY TOMLIN

Alone Feeling Heart Mindset Myself Night

If you have a dog or a cat, you know how developed they can be. How sensitive, how aware. They suffer. We all do.

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If you have a dog or a cat, you know how developed they can be. How sensitive, how aware. They suffer. We all do.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Lily Tomlin Quotes