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I’m in nobody’s circle, I’ve always been an outsider.

Joan Rivers

Nothing is yours permanently so you better enjoy it while it’s happening.
JOAN RIVERS

Enjoyment Philosophy Yourself
I hate housework! You make the beds, you do the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.
JOAN RIVERS

Bed Hate Myself Start Yourself
When you first get married, they open the car door for you. Eighteen years now…once he opened the car door for me in the last four years – we were on the freeway at the time.
JOAN RIVERS

Couple Freedom Marriage Time Yourself
I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking.
JOAN RIVERS

Inspirational Memories Myself Success Talk Thinking
Edgar had a heart attack, and I’m to blame. We were making love, and I took the bag off my head.
JOAN RIVERS

Blame Head Heart Love Myself Sex
Your anger can be 49 percent and your comedy 51 percent, and you’re okay. If the anger is 51 percent, the comedy is gone.
JOAN RIVERS

Angry Comedy Yourself
You know you’re getting old when work is a lot less fun and fun is a lot more work.
JOAN RIVERS

Deep Fun Funny Old Work Yourself
I’m no cook. When I want lemon on chicken, I spray it with Pledge.
JOAN RIVERS

Cook Food Myself
I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.
JOAN RIVERS

Body Memories Myself Women
The fashion magazines are suggesting that women wear clothes that are ‘age appropriate.’ For me that would be a shroud.
JOAN RIVERS

Age Book Fashion Myself Woman
You know it’s time to start using mouthwash when your dentist leaves the room and sends in a canary.
JOAN RIVERS

Animal Start Time Yourself
In life the only thing that you can expect is the unexpected; the only surprise is a day that has none.
JOAN RIVERS

Day Expectation Life Yourself
When you can laugh at yourself no one can ever make a fool of you.
JOAN RIVERS

Fools Laughter Yourself
Just remember: Surviving is the best revenge, no matter what the disaster has been.
JOAN RIVERS

Hard Time Remember Revenge Survive
With age comes wisdom. You don’t need big boobs to be feminine. Look at Liberace.
JOAN RIVERS

Age Female Need Wisdom Yourself
If two people want to get married, get married! The Victorians had a great saying: As long as it doesn’t scare the horses, do what you want. And I absolutely believe that.
JOAN RIVERS

Believe Greatness Marriage People Scare

I’m in nobody’s circle, I’ve always been an outsider.

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I’m in nobody’s circle, I’ve always been an outsider.

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