To me absurdity is the only reality.
FRANK ZAPPAThe first thing you have to do if you want to raise nice kids, is you have to talk to them like they are people instead of talking to them like they’re property.
More Frank Zappa Quotes
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Beware of the fish people, they are the true enemy.
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We pretend to be a free society, and we pretend to be an adult society, but if you look at the facts, our news is just as contrived, and controlled as Pravda!
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Why do you necessarily have to be wrong just because a few million people think you are?
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Music is the only religion that delivers the goods.
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The richest people in the world aren’t particularly smart or happy. And the happiest people in the world aren’t particularly smart or rich. That leaves me making music. But we can’t talk about that.
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The most important thing to do in your life is to not interfere with somebody else’s life.
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We could improve worldwide mental health if we acknowledged that parents can make you crazy.
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Tobacco is my favorite vegetable.
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Republicans stand for raw, unbridled evil and greed and ignorance smothered in balloons and ribbons.
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Censoring what you say is one of the ways in which people who are not nice can take away your personal freedom.
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Modern music is people who can’t think signing artists who can’t write songs to make records for people who can’t hear.
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If your children ever find out how lame you really are, they’ll murder you in your sleep.
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I enjoy irritating the people who enjoy being irritated.
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One size does not fit all.
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You are what you is, you is what you am, you ain’t what you’re not. So see what you got?
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The difference between religions and cults is determined by how much real estate is owned.
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One and one is eleven.
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Music is the most physically inspiring of all the arts.
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Beauty is a pair of shoes that makes you wanna die.
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There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life.
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If you want to get laid, go to college. If you want an education, go to the library.
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The price of meat has just gone up and your old lady has just gone down.
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Information is not knowledge. Knowledge is not wisdom. Wisdom is not truth. Truth is not beauty. Beauty is not love. Love is not music. Music is the best.
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If you pick up a guitar and it says, ‘take me, I’m yours,’ then that’s the one for you.
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Republican is fine, if your a millionaire. Democrats is fair, if all you own is what you wear. Neither of them’s really right, cause neither of them care.
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Nobody looks good with brown lipstick on.
FRANK ZAPPA