People ought to be one of two things, young or dead.
DOROTHY PARKERMoney cannot buy health, but I’d settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.
More Dorothy Parker Quotes
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Maybe it is only I, but conditions are such these days, that if you use studiously correct grammar, people suspect you of homosexual tendencies.
DOROTHY PARKER -
I like best to have one book in my hand, and a stack of others on the floor beside me, so as to know the supply of poppy and mandragora will not run out before the small hours.
DOROTHY PARKER -
There’s life for you. Spend the best years of your life studying penmanship and rhetoric and syntax and Beowulf and George Eliot, and then somebody steals your pencil.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Now I know the things I know, and I do the things I do; and if you do not like me so, to hell, my love, with you!
DOROTHY PARKER -
Don’t feel bad when I die; I’ve been dead for a long time.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Never throw mud: you can miss the target, but your hands will remain dirty.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Writing is the art of applying the ass to the seat.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Vice is nice, but liquor is quicker.
DOROTHY PARKER -
They sicken of the calm who know the storm.
DOROTHY PARKER -
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
DOROTHY PARKER -
His voice was as intimate as the rustle of sheets.
DOROTHY PARKER -
The only “ism” Hollywood believes in is plagiarism.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it and it darts away.
DOROTHY PARKER -
And I’ll stay off Verlaine too; he was always chasing Rimbauds.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses.
DOROTHY PARKER