Telegram to a friend who had just become a mother after a prolonged pregnancy: Good work, Mary. We all knew you had it in you.
DOROTHY PARKERPeople ought to be one of two things, young or dead.
More Dorothy Parker Quotes
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If you want to know what God thinks about money, just look at the people He gives it to.
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But I don’t give up; I forget why not.
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Money cannot buy health, but I’d settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.
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You can’t teach an old dogma new tricks.
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The Monte Carlo casino refused to admit me until I was properly dressed so I went and found my stockings, and then came back and lost my shirt.
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If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
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The only dependable law of life – everything is always worse than you thought it was going to be.
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Time may be a great healer, but it’s a lousy beautician.
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Of course I talk to myself. I like a good speaker, and I appreciate an intelligent audience.
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Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
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I’m not a writer with a drinking problem, I’m a drinker with a writing problem.
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He is a writer for the ages, the ages of four to eight.
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Most good women are hidden treasures who are only safe because nobody looks for them.
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The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity.
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Friends come and go but I wouldn’t have thought you’d be one of them.
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And if my heart be scarred and burned, The safer, I, for all I learned.
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I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, but in all history, which has held billions and billions of human beings, not a single one ever had a happy ending.
DOROTHY PARKER -
It’s not the tragedies that kill us; it’s the messes.
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Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
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Ridicule may be a shield, but it is not a weapon.
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And I’ll stay off Verlaine too; he was always chasing Rimbauds.
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Quick!! Act as if nothing has happened!
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Honesty means nothing until you are tested under circumstances where you are sure you could get away with dishonesty.
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That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.
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Years are only garments, and you either wear them with style all your life, or else you go dowdy to the grave.
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I don’t know much about being a millionaire, but I’ll bet I’d be darling at it.
DOROTHY PARKER