You can lead a horticulture, but you can’t make her think.
DOROTHY PARKERIf I didn’t care for fun and such, I’d probably amount to much. But I shall stay the way I am, Because I do not give a damn.
More Dorothy Parker Quotes
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This is me apologizing. I am a fool, a bird-brain, a liar and a horse-thief. I wouldn’t touch a superlative again with an umbrella.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Creativity is a wild mind and a disciplined eye.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Don’t look at me in that tone of voice.
DOROTHY PARKER -
If you wear a short enough skirt, the party will come to you.
DOROTHY PARKER -
There’s life for you. Spend the best years of your life studying penmanship and rhetoric and syntax and Beowulf and George Eliot, and then somebody steals your pencil.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Misfortune, and recited misfortune especially, can be prolonged to the point where it ceases to excite pity and arouses only irritation.
DOROTHY PARKER -
But I don’t give up; I forget why not.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Of Orson Welles: It’s like meeting God without dying.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Three be the things I shall never attain: Envy, content, and sufficient champagne.
DOROTHY PARKER -
And if my heart be scarred and burned, The safer, I, for all I learned.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Ducking for apples — change one letter and it’s the story of my life.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Writing is the art of applying the ass to the seat.
DOROTHY PARKER -
I don’t know much about being a millionaire, but I’ll bet I’d be darling at it.
DOROTHY PARKER -
I don’t mind anything that’s written about me, as long as it’s not true.
DOROTHY PARKER -
Maybe it is only I, but conditions are such these days, that if you use studiously correct grammar, people suspect you of homosexual tendencies.
DOROTHY PARKER