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Critics are like eunuchs; they can tell you what to do, but they can’t do it themselves!

Brendan Behan

There’s no bad publicity except an obituary.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Bad Obituary Publicity
Whatever you hold in contempt is your jailer.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Contempt Jailer Prison
I only take a drink on two occasions – when I’m thirsty and when I’m not.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Alcohol Drinking Two
There is no human situation so miserable that it cannot be made worse by the presence of a policeman.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Made Miserable Situation
I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger, the food cheaper and the old men and old women warmer in the winter and happier in the summer.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Beer Summer Winter
The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Marriage Sexy
You made one mistake. You married me.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cynical Married Mistake
I’m a drinker with a writing problem.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Drinkers Problem Writing
Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how it’s done, they’ve seen it done every day, but they’re unable to do it themselves.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Criticism Editors Funny
That you, sister. May you be the mother of a bishop.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Humor Mother
A general and a bit of shooting makes you forget your troubles … it takes your mind off the cost of living.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cost General Living Mind War
Failure at a task may be the result of having tackled it at the wrong time.
BRENDAN BEHAN

May Results Tasks
Many a man has decided to stay alive not because of the will to live but because of the determination not to give assorted surviving bastards the satisfaction of his death.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Determination Men Suicide
A pedestrian ought to be legally allowed to toss at least one hand grenade at a motorist every day.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Hands Life Modern Toss
Ninety-seven saint days a year wouldn’t affect the theater, but two Yom Kippurs would ruin it.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Saint Theatre Two Years
Critics are like eunuchs; they can tell you what to do, but they can’t do it themselves!
BRENDAN BEHAN

Critics Eunuchs Themselves

Critics are like eunuchs; they can tell you what to do, but they can’t do it themselves!

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Critics are like eunuchs; they can tell you what to do, but they can’t do it themselves!

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Popular Authors

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