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Every cripple has his own way of walking.

Brendan Behan

A general and a bit of shooting makes you forget your troubles … it takes your mind off the cost of living.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cost General Living Mind War
You made one mistake. You married me.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Cynical Married Mistake
I only take a drink on two occasions – when I’m thirsty and when I’m not.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Alcohol Drinking Two
I was court-martialled in my absence, and sentenced to death in my absence, so I said they could shoot me in my absence.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Dublin Irish Life People
I saw a notice that said “Drink Canada Dry” and I’ve just started.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Beer Drinking Food
In a society which really supported marriage the wife would be encouraged to go to the office and make love to her husband on the company’s time and with its blessing.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Blessing Husband Marriage
Whatever you hold in contempt is your jailer.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Contempt Jailer Prison
There is no human situation so miserable that it cannot be made worse by the presence of a policeman.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Made Miserable Situation
I cannot imagine any crime worse than taking a life, can you? -It’d depend whose life.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Capital Crime Imagine Punishment
What the hell difference does it make, left or right? There were good men lost on both sides.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Differences History Men
That you, sister. May you be the mother of a bishop.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Humor Mother
An author’s first duty is to let down his country.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Down Firsts Let
I am married to Beatrice Salkeld, a painter. We have no children, except me.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Children Married Painter
Pound notes are the best religion in the world.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Money World
Critics are like eunuchs; they can tell you what to do, but they can’t do it themselves!
BRENDAN BEHAN

Critics Eunuchs Themselves
A pedestrian ought to be legally allowed to toss at least one hand grenade at a motorist every day.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Hands Life Modern Toss
The big difference between sex for money and sex for free is that sex for money usually costs a lot less.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Funny Marriage Sexy
It is a good deed to forget a poor joke
BRENDAN BEHAN

Deeds Forget Poor
There’s no one, no one, loves you like yourself.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Like Love One Love You
Nothing hurts more than the friendly letter that one never got around to writing.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Friendship Hurt Writing
If you accept your limitations you go beyond them.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Accepting Country Irish Limitation People
Scream at God if that’s the only thing that will get results.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Prayer Results Scream
God forgive us-but most of us grew up to be the sort of men our mothers warned us against.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Family Forgive Men Mother
He was born an Englishman and remained one for years.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Born Country Irish People Years
New York is my Lourdes, where I go for spiritual refreshment… a place where you’re least likely to be bitten by a wild goat.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Country Funny Irish People Spiritual
A man is fortunate if he encounters living examples of vice, as well as of virtue, to inspire him.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Inspire Men Role Models
Many a man has decided to stay alive not because of the will to live but because of the determination not to give assorted surviving bastards the satisfaction of his death.
BRENDAN BEHAN

Determination Men Suicide

Every cripple has his own way of walking.

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Every cripple has his own way of walking.

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