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I’d like a nice piece of salmon that’s not too pink inside and yet isn’t too dry or crisp either.

Bob Saget

It’s okay to get stoned, as long as its not by other people.
BOB SAGET

Long Okay People
It’s 103 comedians, or however many it is, and how would everyone tell it. It’s enough people of substance that it makes you think of the people who aren’t there that are alive.
BOB SAGET

Make People Think Thinking
I’m doing 5000 seat theaters and audiences are going nuts, it’s fantastic and it makes me very happy. I’m dirty, but not like this; I just do comedy that I find funny. I’m working on a new tv show for cable and it’s not set up yet.
BOB SAGET

Comedy Dirty Nuts Show Shows Television
I have the brain of a German Shepherd and the body of a 16-year-old boy; they’re both in my car and I want you to see them
BOB SAGET

Boys Car Country Years
A lot of the comedians don’t even tell the joke. Like only three tell the joke, the rest of them dissect it.
BOB SAGET

Comedian Jokes Three
All I’ve ever done is try to entertain my way through a life that often has a huge amount of heaviness in it.
BOB SAGET

Around Done Heaviness Trying Way
Everyone I love I pay.
BOB SAGET

Everyone Love Pay
I have no agenda, nothing to control.
BOB SAGET

Agendas Control Nothing
Valuable people are undervalued.
BOB SAGET

People Undervalued Valuable
My mom just told me it’s impossible to know what’s going to happen in life. Except with breakfast, cause she eats the same thing every day.
BOB SAGET

Breakfast Causes Mom
Today is a brand new day. A day of change, of promise, of creativity, of kindness, and of love. I’m going back to bed.
BOB SAGET

Creativity Day Kindness New
At the end of the day it’s the end of the day.
BOB SAGET

Day End Over Time
My wife is a saint. She’s Gandhi. She walks around in diapers and won’t eat.
BOB SAGET

Diapers Saint Wife
The squirrel in my yard really knows his way around the neighborhood.
BOB SAGET

Squirrels Way Yards
My father once told me, and it’s stuck with me to this day: As you walk through life, every time you fart it pushes you forward.
BOB SAGET

Fart Father Stuck
Nobody can tell me what I can or can’t do, except they can.
BOB SAGET

Except Nobody People

I’d like a nice piece of salmon that’s not too pink inside and yet isn’t too dry or crisp either.

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I’d like a nice piece of salmon that’s not too pink inside and yet isn’t too dry or crisp either.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bob Saget Quotes