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I’d like a nice piece of salmon that’s not too pink inside and yet isn’t too dry or crisp either.

Bob Saget

Sometimes I wish I hadn’t said something foolish. It is then that I realize the power of mime.
BOB SAGET

Realizing Sometimes Wish
I never went to camp as a kid. I couldn’t get into an Ivy League school. I wouldn’t join a biker club.
BOB SAGET

Biker Club Kids School
When you’re famous, you’re always famous. It doesn’t go away.
BOB SAGET

Away Famous Going
I just had a pedicure. My feet are soft like a baby’s behind. If his ass was covered in calluses.
BOB SAGET

Baby Feet Pedicures
Stop It, stop lighting your butthol on fire, and everybody listen to me. If you light your ass on fire, I hope you have boxers or a filter of somekind, because if your a bareass person.
BOB SAGET

Fire Light People
At the end of the day it’s the end of the day.
BOB SAGET

Day End Over Time
Wise men say, only fools rush in. Wise men are so slow.
BOB SAGET

Fool Men Wise
I was in a supermarket and I saw Paul Newman’s face on salad dressing and spaghetti sauce….I thought he was missing.
BOB SAGET

Dressing Missing Salad Sauce
The squirrel in my yard really knows his way around the neighborhood.
BOB SAGET

Squirrels Way Yards
Some people rely on rumors and gossip because they are devoid of any original thought.
BOB SAGET

Gossip People Rumor
My father once told me, and it’s stuck with me to this day: As you walk through life, every time you fart it pushes you forward.
BOB SAGET

Fart Father Stuck
All I’ve ever done is try to entertain my way through a life that often has a huge amount of heaviness in it.
BOB SAGET

Around Done Heaviness Trying Way
In the creative sense, I’m looking forward to collaborating with people I have mutual respect for to create some really good work.
BOB SAGET

Creative Forward Looking People
Jon Lovitz. Jon, your act is like masturbation: you’re the only one who enjoys it, and you should be arrested for doing it in public.
BOB SAGET

Enjoy Masturbation Public
The selfish and usually pointless approach is to try to get both done simultaneously – accomplish your work at hand while begging forgiveness of those close to you while you’re basically working in front of them during what could’ve been specifically ‘quality time.’
BOB SAGET

Hands Selfish Trying
I think comedy is on an organic upsurge right now because when I started, it was 1978 at The Comedy Store and Letterman had just stopped emceeing his morning show.
BOB SAGET

Comedy Morning Thinking

I’d like a nice piece of salmon that’s not too pink inside and yet isn’t too dry or crisp either.

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I’d like a nice piece of salmon that’s not too pink inside and yet isn’t too dry or crisp either.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bob Saget Quotes