black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

My mom just told me it’s impossible to know what’s going to happen in life. Except with breakfast, cause she eats the same thing every day.

Bob Saget

Friend of mine just told me he used to be a bad alcoholic. I calmed him down. Told him he was a good alcoholic just a horrible drinker.
BOB SAGET

Alcoholics Horrible Used
Nothing worse than a piece of dried out fish.
BOB SAGET

Fishes Nothing Pieces
My humor was kind of from my dad and all the stuff that we went through, which was a lot of death. My humor was an escape.
BOB SAGET

Dad Escape Humor Kind Study Stuff
I was on Entourage last week smoking a bong and making out with hookers and I did show them that before, cause it wasn’t a hard ‘r’ cause a lot of people are watching that show that they know, not my little one – she’s 12, but very sophisticated so it’s an unusual case.
BOB SAGET

Littles People Smoking
It’s okay to get stoned, as long as its not by other people.
BOB SAGET

Long Okay People
When a normal 17-year-old girl storms out of the house or 15-year-old boy is mad at his mom or dad, they’re not talking the way people talk on TV. Unless it’s cable.
BOB SAGET

Cable Storms Television Things Unless
It’s 103 comedians, or however many it is, and how would everyone tell it. It’s enough people of substance that it makes you think of the people who aren’t there that are alive.
BOB SAGET

Make People Think Thinking
My dad’s like, If your mom and I are having sex and we videotape it and she falls out of bed funny, can I win ten-thousand dollars?
BOB SAGET

Dad Dollar Funny Mom Sex
Some people rely on rumors and gossip because they are devoid of any original thought.
BOB SAGET

Gossip People Rumor
I become a chameleon for wherever I am.
BOB SAGET

Become Chameleon Whenever
I love my mom! You can too for $12!
BOB SAGET

Affection Emotion Love Mom
I have no agenda, nothing to control.
BOB SAGET

Agendas Control Nothing
My favorite procrastination is to make the choice to have valuable times with human beings that I care about instead of holing myself up alone to get my work done.
BOB SAGET

Choices Done Procrastination
Not a lot of people have done this. Stop It. This is why. You can cauterize your asshole shut, so when you fart it has nowhere to go and you can have a fart attack.
BOB SAGET

Attack Cauterize Done People
My haircutter figured out I whine less if I’m under general anesthesia. I just hope when I awaken they haven’t given me a Brazilian wax.
BOB SAGET

Anesthesia Given Havens
If you’re a host of a video show and you’re on the cleanest show on television for eight years, people want to say, ‘Well, that’s what that person does.’ That was the dilemma for me, career-wise.
BOB SAGET

Career Eight Wise

My mom just told me it’s impossible to know what’s going to happen in life. Except with breakfast, cause she eats the same thing every day.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

My mom just told me it’s impossible to know what’s going to happen in life. Except with breakfast, cause she eats the same thing every day.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Bob Saget Quotes