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People do what they do to each other and they feed on it.

Bob Saget

I don’t censor myself, but I don’t want to force my sick-skewed version of the world, either.
BOB SAGET

Censor Sick World
A lot of the comedians don’t even tell the joke. Like only three tell the joke, the rest of them dissect it.
BOB SAGET

Comedian Jokes Three
It’s a new day: Full of promise and love. The only thing that can take away that great feeling is – reading the news or speaking to people.
BOB SAGET

Day New People Reading
I am stressed because once I am flattened out so thin to be able to slide under a doorway, I may never be able to ever be unflattened so I could be regular sized again.
BOB SAGET

Doorways May Stressed Unflattered
I love watching people get hit in the crotch. But only if they get back up. If their teeth are bleeding, if they’re really hurt, if an ambulance has to come, I’m not laughing.
BOB SAGET

Hurt Laughing People
I love my mom! You can too for $12!
BOB SAGET

Affection Emotion Love Mom
I’m psyched about what I can contribute that can be meaningful to myself and to others.
BOB SAGET

Meaningful Myself Physical
I don’t roll like that but I’ve never been with a hooker either. Yeah, that’s good to say in an interview cause I feel bad a little because people grew up watching me and that’s a little disturbing.
BOB SAGET

Interviews Littles People
Saw a man in Whole Foods yelling at his son, What are you doing?! You know I don’t eat bread!! Is there such a thing as health food abuse?
BOB SAGET

Men Saw Son Yelling
My favorite Dylan song? I think it’s ‘Just Like a Woman.’ It always makes me cry.
BOB SAGET

Cry Favorite Song Thinking
I think comedy is on an organic upsurge right now because when I started, it was 1978 at The Comedy Store and Letterman had just stopped emceeing his morning show.
BOB SAGET

Comedy Morning Thinking
If you’re a host of a video show and you’re on the cleanest show on television for eight years, people want to say, ‘Well, that’s what that person does.’ That was the dilemma for me, career-wise.
BOB SAGET

Career Eight Wise
I was going to do a big radio show, and I said to my driver, ‘Radio can wait, take me to the Full House house.’ It literally was a drive-by.
BOB SAGET

House Waiting Yesterday
My mom told me she thinks a man in the market felt her up today. I asked, Where did he touch you? She said, On my knee, Bobby.
BOB SAGET

Mom Thinking Today Told
My dad told me if I was ever intimidated by anyone, just picture them with their clothes off. He said that’s how he dealt with my mom.
BOB SAGET

Clothes Dad Mom
Stop It, stop lighting your butthol on fire, and everybody listen to me. If you light your ass on fire, I hope you have boxers or a filter of somekind, because if your a bareass person.
BOB SAGET

Fire Light People

People do what they do to each other and they feed on it.

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People do what they do to each other and they feed on it.

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